Thursday, September 18, 2014

49? How did that happen?

Can I really be 49 years old???  Ok that just sounds OLD!  This is the last year I can say "oh I'm in my 40's"  49 sounds grown up LOL  TOO grown up. 

I really don't have many regrets in my life.  But I do wish I'd let myself have more fun in my teen and 20's.  Looking back, I was way too serious and old.  Oh I had fun but I took LIFE far too serious and worried too much.  I worked too hard.  I guess being raised by old folks, colored my views on life.    Now I'm not saying to be lazy or anything like that, but I should have lightened up some and enjoyed myself more.  Even into my 30's, I needed to "let it go"  Believe me, I truly have some good friends who put up with me in my teens and 20's when I was trying to get the whole world saved......  (they will read this and laugh and know EXACTLY what I mean!)  And the shocker is they are still my friends! 

Looking back, I was just too intense, about everything, from saving the world, to college, to work.....   I couldn't put things in their place and leave them there.  What I mean is I'd worried about my job, while I was at college or I'd worry about a class when I was out with friends.  Or I was a little too involved in ministry while trying to do all these other things.  I can remember my friends going out and they'd try and get me to go and I'd stay back and work or do something with the ministry.  I could never give myself any time  off.   Even later on, I felt like I had to do perfect on my job and I'd bring work home all the time......really so much of that stuff I should have just "let it go"

Let me clarify about the ministry part......EVEN with ministry people can be too intense.  When Jon and I married, we were both too intense about ministry.  Oh dear us.....!   LOL  We both felt like we always had to be "doing"  Having kids helped us to realize you have to focus on relationships before anything else. 

NOW with heavier responsibilities than I ever imagined I'd have, I'm a much more relaxed person.  does that make ANY sense???    I'm glad I found more of a balance, but wish it had not taken me so long to do so.  I look back and think "there were drugs for That"   LOL 

Another regret I have is ever worrying about what someone thought of me......yeah that is gone LOL.... I took cookies to Shad's classroom because it is his 11th birthday!!!!

Hot sweaty boy, just coming from PE
(no they were not homemade!)
then I rode around as I was waiting for our pizza to be ready to be picked up
(got some good church boys who come and do the yards every week for volunteer hours for college and they get pizza!!!!)
Rode out to the property.  Got behind a tractor and had to go slow.  It made me think that it is so nice to live in the country and the only traffic jams you have is behind a tractor changing fields:)
the picture below is the road we will live on, see our fence line on the right?
Country Roads, take me home! 

And you know we have to live near a swamp:)

then got picked up the pizza, got home and ate lunch with my friend while her boys worked hard!
Later Sarah showing off standing in "her" window.  I hope she has a window with a sun view in the new house!  Sarah is standing more and more daily.  She even will stand by the window and deliberately  let go and stand by herself for a few seconds before falling. 

The day is ending with Shad opening his presents once Steve gets home from college tonight and we have a cake to share:)   I guess I can tell you that Shad is getting a REAL walkie-talkie set.  He saw a junky one at a store and wanted me to buy it.  I told him I'd get him a real set.  Well I didn't know how much a "real" set cost LOL but I know he'll have fun with it!  He also likes "Diary of a Wimpy Kid" and has the book set, so we got him the DVD set too, along with a Lego movie, The Green Lantern movie,  Two Percy something movies....LOL  And a Kung Fu Panda movie. 
Again I want to thank you all for your gift of the Well in Ukraine.  That makes me so happy!  Pray as they are getting everything done with the permits (even with war, Ukraine loves its paperwork!)  They are making progress! 
And I want to say how much I appreciate God's hand in my life from my birth just minutes after reaching the hospital, to this very day, God has been with me, helping me, every step of the way.  He's been and will be a Good God to me.  I don't understand everything that has happened in my life but I know He has walked with me through it all.  And there is nothing I can look back on (except Selah's accident) where I do not see how God allowed or caused things to be.  Even some very hurtful things,  today, are a thing of beauty to me.  Even with accident, I can say I know God was with us.  And maybe as far as the accident goes, that will be all I can say is "I know God was with us"  Maybe that is enough......

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