Wednesday, August 16, 2017
A Car Ride
As always car rides with kids tend to bring out the best conversations. It has happened with both of our older boys. Today Shad and I went to the library and had time to talk. He had been hearing some news of what happened this weekend in Virginia so we talked about it. Shad has always been interested in the news and world events. He asked me what a "white supremacist" was and said he'd never heard of it before. He then asked me about the other two groups of people who were there, BLM and Antifa and what they believed. Then he said "Well all of them are wrong!" and he also said none of them would like our family. He was shocked that some people thought the president was wrong for saying all sides were to blame.
Out of the mouths of babes....
I almost don't want to add to this post because it was so simple and true what Shad said but I have to say I totally agree with my son! We've faced discrimination because of Shad a few times so we actually know what it is like to have our child treated different because of his race.
When you love someone you don't see their race or handicap (if any) This is the honest truth and kinda weird but I don't see Shad's race or his eye loss unless I'm looking at a picture of him. (yes that is strange but I can see it in pictures but not in our real life! I also notice my other kids differences in pictures but not in the real world) He's just Shad to me- my son. A few years ago I had actually convinced myself that people probably didn't think he was Asian because I did not see it. I told a friend that and she laughed and told me that he did indeed look Asian still! I think being Asian is great so don't think I'm dissing Asians, I just really became color blind to it because I loved my son so much (although he can get on my last ever living nerve just like his older brother can!)
Some people say it's wrong to be "color-blind" because we should see and respect the color of a person. In my home I'm color blind without thinking about it. . I feel like I used to do it without thinking outside of my world but over the past few years color & being politically correct has seemed to become such an issue.
Love can make a huge difference but we live in a fallen world and I don't expect that too many BLM and White Supremacists will start hugging each other...it can happen between a few people and I pray that it does but I'm a realist.
Until a few years ago I thought most racism was gone from our country. I'd encountered some living as a white woman in a mostly black neighborhood in NYC. There was one shopkeeper that was obviously racist towards me. Over the moths and years he became nicer to me because I think he saw me for myself not just a white woman. Back then it was exciting to live in a very diverse area of NYC with people from all over the world living together. I felt like we were just one big melting pot. But it seems like in the last decade racism has grown to new levels. It's sad!
It's on both sides of this recent conflict. And quite honestly I feel that all of the combatants were there to cause trouble and deserved each other!
It's strange how conflicts seem to take a life of their own and snowball- some people have way too much time on their hands for sure! Now all of a sudden we have to tear down Confederate War memorials. That is just crazy! I feel like I'm living through the Twilight Zone. History is History. I don't agree with every statue and monument that is in the US (for example a monument in Seattle to Stalin who killed millions or the one to Margret Sander the founder of Planned Parenthood who was so very racist that she spoke and talked about how abortion could rid the world of blacks!)
I'm going to speak out as a voice of reason in my sphere of influence. Just because I may see something differently I'm not a racist. In my life I was never afforded "white privilege" nor do I feel guilty for something that took place over a century before I was born! My family history doesn't include any instances of slave ownership. Even if it did, I can not control things that happened 100 years before I was born. It's crazy!
Any psychologist or counselor will tell a person it is not healthy to have bitterness in their hearts or to continue looking back on an incident in the past. As a country we need to look forward and not allow any side to drag us down. Unfortunately the media can't be controlled but if we quit watching it 24/7 it might be healthier (for me too)