Journey

Yesterday we took Sam to St Joe's to see Dr Declue, a doctor who specializes in metabolic disorders. He ran some more blood work on Sam and ordered an ultrasound of his liver. The liver may not be storing his sugars correctly and that is something that can be fixed with meds. He also gave me a prescription for a shot if Sam becomes unconscious or has a seizure. The only thing is the shot has to be mixed up...can you see me mixing a shot when Sam is seizing....God I hope I can do it!!! Anyhow he thinks cause Sam is so small (the size of a 2.6 yr old ~even tho he is gonna be 6 yr old in Feb) that's why he is so hypoglycemic. Usually kids grow out of it by now but he has so little fat to draw on that there is no reserve for him. One idea to prevent the episodes is to add CORNSTARCH to his bottles of pedisure. It seems to be helping kids to maintain their sugars better. I had just read that on the Internet so I wasn't surprised. The dietitian is calling me with the amount to start giving him. Maybe that will be all he needs!

So Sam is keeping us on our toes as usual but I love him so much, all this other stuff doesn't matter. WHATEVER it takes to keep him healthy I'll do!!! When it's your child, you learn you can step up to the plate. I can remember all the different things I do or have had to do in the past and the fear I had starting the things...but then you get used to it an just do it!

The biggest step was coming home with him from the NICU on a heart monitor and oxygen and the suction machine. WOW that wa a trip but we made it through...then after his first corneal operation and the doctor explaining to me how to do the eydrops into that little tiny BLOODY eye! Somehow we didn't get the explanation BEFORE the surgery that we'd be doing eyedrops after.....I looked at the doctor like "you're crazy! Surely you are gonna send a nurse home with me...."I truly thought I'd pass out but guess what? I didn't!!! Then the blood sticks! OMG I was shaking the first few times I had to do them. I'm so over that now!!!! It's nothing! So what's the big deal about giving him a shot....I don't know...I feel faint!!!!

Life is a journey~you can NOT control it! but you can control how YOU respond to life's challenges! I want to respond with faith and humor! I laugh at situations alot cause that's the only way to get through things sometimes. If I can find some humor in the situation it helps. You can live your life with all gloom and doom...but who wants to??? Life is gonna be hard, it's scriptural- that means there is plenty of scripture to back me up:) But you can CHOSE to trust God and know that He'll be with you. You can also CHOSE to look on the lighter side when ever possible.

Have you meant people that take themselves and their situations too seriously? I have and it's so stupid! I've been around some who are just going through the natural processes of life and you'd think they had such heavier burdens than anyone else in the world. Then I met families who are REALLY going through some firey trials and they just ooze peace, contentment and faith! I want to be like that!!! We all are gonna face hard times, loss of a loved one, health issues...but we've got to remember this world is not our ultimate home, we're only passing through. If we trust in Jesus, one day it is ALL gonna be alright.

I'm not saying not to be sympathetic of situations. The bible says "weep with those who weep" When you go through a life journey that is hard, it is easier to weep with those who weep. Even if your situations are not the same, the emotions are. I cry so much easier now for others than I ever have before in my life because I KNOW some of the heartache the others are going through. I'm glad my heart is softer to others. I'm glad my heart is moved with compassion for the trials that others go through. But again, this world is not our home. ONE DAY everything is gonna be ok! That's what I hold onto and I think I have the authority to speak into other's lives that same truth~because I go through some rough times that others will never have to face. I don't know why some people can go through trial after trial and other's just face the "normal" trials of life (parents growing older, dying...small health issues...) I don't know some folks have easier lives...it's just life. there's no reason to get angry or bitter....because one day EVERYTHING is gonna be alright!

I look at things so different than I did before I had Sam. I feel blessed even in the midst of a storm. I can't explain that at all. It's certainly NOT because I'm more spiritual or a better person...but trusting God in the midst of life's struggles and truly believing He is in control, is a wonderful place to be at!! I could be bitter but I'm not, I'm so thankful for what I have and the promise of heaven/eternity...