Great day for Selah ------and GroundHog Day begins....

Selah had a good day.  She slept great last night which meant we did too!  I only got up with her once to change her and even then she had a low normal heart rate.  Her PT came today and said her legs looked great:)  She worked with her for quite awhile and said that her ankles were not drawing up in the least bit (very important!)  YEAH!  Some kids have the surgery and then draw up as soon as they are out of the casts.  Usually the doctors wait a year or so before doing the surgery to ensure that that won't happen but Thank God it seems like it has been the right thing to do for Selah and it has worked.  She will get her brand new wheelchair on Monday:)  We are hoping it will be much more comfy for her than anything else we have tried. 

Her heart rate and BP have stayed good today, even during therapy.  I am so thankful for medicine!  I believe God gives doctors and scientists the wisdom to research and develop medicines to help others.  To see what a difference being on an antibiotic has made in her in the past few days is reason enough to be thankful!!!!!!

After PT we went crossbow shopping.  We didn't buy Steve anything for Christmas.  He has had a renewed interested in crossbows and archery and wanted to get one.  So this is his very late Christmas present but one I think he will really enjoy!  He is quite the marksman!  We also had to buy a new target as the crossbow would have blown up the one Shad uses for his bow and arrow  (oh and now Shad wants a new bow!)   I like for them to have anything that will keep them outside and off the tv/games! 

 

Jon looking at the crossbow  ( I liked the second archery shop the best they had a waiting room area!)

 

Steve is happy

 

 

All the animals there were killed by either a crossbow or a bow and arrow including the gator

 

I saw a baby gator in a pond near the hospital yesterday.  he better watch out LOL

 

 

 

 

it takes strength to pull that back (or in my case to hold it steady LOL)

 

 

 

 

 

 

Steve says he wants to go hunting...I can NOT believe I raised a child who wants to hunt!!!!!  What happened?  He used to be such an animal lover!

 

We also went to Whole Foods today...that was an experience.  I'd love for us to only eat organic, but it is expensive.  Luckily I can buy some of the brands they carry at Publix and it is cheaper there!  But it was fun and I loved that there was nothing with nitrates in it in the store.  All the meats were nitrides free.  I hate nitrates and really feel like they are very dangerous.  It is in almost all CURED meats BUT you can look and find things without it if you try. 

 

So that was our big day out on the town.

 

 

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Thinking back to one year ago...we started what we called "Ground Hog Days".  If you ever have seen the movie where Bill Murray has to repeat ONE day of his life over and over....then you'll know what I mean LOL

 

We would get up and be ready to meet our driver by 9 or 9:15 am.  Be at the orphanage by 9:30 and see the girls till 11:30 or if we were lucky and the driver was busy...maybe till noon.  Then we'd go back to the apartment, eat, go walking around or to the Internet cafe....  Same thing every day but I loved it.

 

Actually we had to go to one of the government buildings that next day for something and then we were back to see the girls....

 

a person cleaning the square downtown

Jon and Lenin  (not John Lennon LOL)

Lenin and me

gangs of stray dogs everywhere  A man was attacked outside out apartment the second night we were there.  a gang of dogs were all over him.  we didn't know what to do, it's not like you can call 911!  A lady came out and hit the dogs with a broom and they left him and he hobbled inside.

 

 

 

yes we were obsessed with Lenin....It just amazed us to see him.  In Kiev there is a small bust of him, we saw it but in Torez....just 30 miles or so from Russia...Lenin is everywhere!  I have pictures of him that I will show...

The movie theater

 

So after the additional paperwork was done we were off to see the girls. 

 

 

 

Here we are with Selah's personal caregiver Natasha.  She was WONDERFUL and actually cared for Selah.  She had recently taught her to walk.  she was paid for by a ministry called Life 2 Orphans prior to Natasha working with Selah, we think she stayed in her tiny crib. 

 

 

 

 

 

Sarah was so weak and tired she'd just lay in my lap

 

 

 

 

 

I was so worried about her

 

 

 

I really like this picture of us

Selah had to go...

 

The girl holding Selah and the one in the striped shirts live there.  The little girl in the pink was a small child who lived there and the lady in the white was Sarah's caregiver

 

I hated giving the girls up daily.  It was hard.

 

 

 

then back to the apartment to have some sort of adventure.  Our living room was the windows behind Jon's shoulder and the bedroom was the next set down. 

 

Soviet housing

 

 

Can I say again how much I/we loved Ukraine?

 

I went quite annoyed and put out that they (the government) would require so much time from us...but I loved every minute of it!  I love that place in a way I can not describe.  Honestly I started wondering if perhaps my family had some roots in Ukraine when I see how much Sarah and Sam resemble each other and the uncanny way I fell in love with that country.  It is a prickly country LOL not one that is easy to love, or easy to live in but I loved it.  It's not like I've never been out of the country before I've traveled but never felt the draw of a country like I do Ukraine. 

 

So that was our second day...we were falling in love with two little girls like crazy...still a little worried about Selah's needs but you will see in the pictures how she began responding more and more.  Sarah was so weak, she'd hold herself up a bit and then just go limp.  It was not her relaxing on me, it was a sick little girl.  You can't really see but on the top of her head, she had bumps, they were covered with various colors of creams, but it bled almost daily.  her hands were covered and bloody at times.  She had scabies...but as you can see she was all over me and I never got it.   I'm so thankful we got to Sarah when we did, I do not think she would have lived much longer.   Selah was in a  much better situation (so to speak) but still needed us.  She had a really good happy caregiver and a 16 yr old teen girl in her room to play with her.  Sarah had no one.  They acted very superstitious towards Sarah since she only had one eye.  I made it a point to show them how much I loved her.  I wish they could see her now! 

 

 

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Please keep Selah in prayer that the meds will work quickly and that she will regain the ground she loses when she is sick.

 

 

 

 

 

Selah's Home:) ----- One year anniversary of meeting the girls!

We're all under one roof tonight.  Selah was released today.  She also got her casts off and her feet/ankles/legs look normal!!!!!!  They had turned in since the accident and her toes pointed downward.  LOVE the way she responded to the surgery.  The doctor feels like she will be fine, wearing the braces AFOs and will maintain her new look.  The AFO's are nice and very small.  I will take pictures tomorrow.

I am beyond exhausted tonight.  I got my 5 laps in this morning at "the Mountain" worked a little bit on the garden and then was at the hospital all day...with the KIDS!  No actually everyone was great.  On the way there it was storming and the interstate had construction....pretty awful driving conditions...that totally stresses me....

We got Selah home and set back up without a nurse.....that was also stressful to me.  When a child is in home health care and then goes in patient, it is a big deal to register them back home...nothing was in place so they won't do it till tomorrow.  That was all I needed.  It's one thing to take care of her at night but it is another to make sure all the machines work and everything is set up right.  We got it done but was very stressful to me. I had to pick up some things at Walmart including a new BP machine I had ordered on line.  Everything took so long.   Then I had to go get her meds...can you believe the pharmacy didn't give us the box?  I picked up her and Sam's monthly meds along with her new prescription then it wasn't in the bag when I got home!  UGH!!!  Jon had to go back to get it.  So I'm tired...I hope I make sense tonight.

BTW, Selah is doing great, her heart rate is in the 80's and she is sleeping away:) 

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Well today was our one year anniversary of meeting the girls....what a day that was....

We rode all night on the train from hell....no shower, I woke up around 5 am and watched the countryside thinking that THIS was where my girls were from.    Our facilitator got up about 6 am and told us to get our things together because when the train stopped for us we had to jump off.  Well 4 people and a ton of luggage just dont' quite jump off LOL   We got dropped off in a small town with dusty streets.  A tough guy had an old 1970 Russian Military Van waiting for us.....we headed off down dirt roads with NOTHING around for miles.  We went around holes in the "road" that you could drive a truck in....I was FREAKING out in my mind by this point.  I was pretty sure we had brought our kids out to the middle of nowhere to die!!!!!

in the van

 

scenery

 

 

 

our van for our time in Ukraine

 

 

So then we drive for about an hour or so and come into town the back way and see our apartment....

 

our apartment building

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

This is where we are supposed to drop the boys off and then Jon & me go to the orphanage....I was about to FREAK...LOL  I didn't say anything but I gave Jon a "look" that said "there aint NO way"...  well our dear facilitator caught on and assured me it would be better inside...it was.....

 

 

 

Steve thought it was a drinking fountain...LOL  Just kidding...

 

 

 

So we dropped the boys off (these pictures were taken much later)  and off we went to a government office to get more permission and to bring some government officials with us for our first meeting.  ....

 

We were just kinda being led by the hand at this point, not knowing what to expect next.....

 

 

 

Downtown Torez Ukraine

 

so we picked up the officials and headed off to the orphanage....

 

We met with the director and gave him some gifts.  We were nervous to meet him as we had heard so many different things about him.  there had been newspaper articles and tv shows done on the mental instuiton that were awful.  We didn't know what to think of him.  He showed us nothing but courtesy and an open door.  He made our adoption easy and gave us free rein at the institution.  Yes it was poor, not the conditions were NOT what we'd expect in America...but as you can see from the pictures, everything was poor...

 

 

So as we made "nice" and did more paperwork...my heart was in my throat knowing that the girls were near...  FINALLY we were taken outside and towards this building....  See the area with green on the top floor?  That was the only "outside " place for the children.  Sarah's room ws the first window by the porch.

 

 

At this point, my legs were shaking so bad, I could hardly walk.  We had an group of maybe 15 people by this time counting all the "older girls"  the adult disabled girls who lived there)  I was hoping no one could see how nervous I was.

 

I'm not a BIG people person...what I mean is actors, stars, celebrities...really do not mean much to me.  The only one I'd loved to have met was Steve Irwin (Croc Hunter)  I'm not impressed by Christan celebrities either (I've met a few of them and I'd rather have met Steve Irwin's crocodiles LOL)  BUT meeting the girls...was so much more important to me than any star in the world!!!

 

So we walked into the building and up some stairs and into a alcove where the girls were!!!  Sarah was in a wheelchair and Selah was standing... my heart just stopped....the tears fell...here they were ...at last...our daughters....

 

 

 

 

I had to be touching both of them at once

 

Sarah started rolling...

my Sarah....

 

what emotions...ONLY if you have taken such a walk, inside an orphanage, can you know how it feels..it is amazing to finally see that little person you fought so hard to get to....

 

 

 

 

 

We were all over the floor with the girls.  I don't think that is normal for the workers to see. 

 

Then the main official government lady asked us if we'd accept them.  I let Jon answer...and he said YES!

 

Then the paperwork began for our court appointment .....

 

 

I have to say we were concerned that day about Selah.  She was very agaited and couldn't look us in the eye.  She was picking little tiny things off the floor and putting them in her mouth.  At one point she fell over Sarah and didn't even seem to notice she was there.  There was alot of people walking around and that seemed to bother her.  Neither of us had seen behavior like she exhibited.  She wasn't aggressive just very different.  I started thinking about various diagnosis to try and figure out what was going on with her.  That day I thought of autism but she certainly wasn't like a classic case of it.  We came to find out that she had institutional autism.  That certainly answered our questions...

 

We did have some concerns, that although she was not aggressive, she was just very out of reality acting and we did not know how she'd treat Sarah or Sam, with them being blind/visionally impaired and not being able to protect themselves or get out of her way.    We had some fears but we felt like we could deal with whatever we had to to help Selah.  We came to find out that love made a HUGE change, even before we left the insituion...much less ever got home with her.

 

Sarah on the other hand was so very weak she could barely hold her head up.  We were terrified she'd die before we got through the whole court experience....

 

We left our short meeting in love with both girls but with alot to think about.....we knew there would be challenges but we were committed.

 

Turns out for Selah and Sarah all they needed was love and a family.  Of course they had delays and physical issues that will never go away BUT all the things we worried about...never came to be.  With Selah we worried about the emotional/psychological issues...within days we saw changes...no she would never be "normal" but she was certainly someone we could work with and love.  With Sarah, as soon as we started visiting, her will to live came back.  We honestly think she had lost her will to live.  She was so lifeless and weak but in just days she was starting to sit herself up and pay attention to us.  Now....she is a mess:)  She never had a real emotion issue.  Everyone comments on how bonded she is with us and it happened so easily...

 

Adopting two "older girls"  Sarah was 5 and and Selah 7 at the time of the adoption...was a big step...and then adopting them NOT from an orphanage BUT rather from a notorious mental institution.....that was very scary....but it was not like some "experts" would say it would be.    Maybe having Sam and adjusting to his delays/vision impairment...has made it easier for us to accept the girls where they were at and we had no real expectations of them.  We didn't know how things would be...but they turned out so good...

 

I've never been happier in my whole life as I was those 14 weeks we had with them at home before the accident....I thought the other day, if I never see Selah healed, at least I had that time that she knew she was loved and she was opening up like a flower to us.  Everyday we saw new changes in her and saw her little heart reaching out and having a family....  she still has us and our love.  We don't know what she understands, but we will do all we can do the rest of our lives to give her the BEST life possible.  I believe she knows she is loved still and she reacts to us.  Tonight it is a blessing to see her sleeping soundly in her clean bed.  I just checked on her and her heart rate is in the low 80's which is perfect and she looks so at peace. 

 

We hate that the accident happen.  Believe me, we all still beat ourselves up with the "If onlys...."  it's never far from our minds.  We try not to focus on it but just the other night Jon started talking about it...rehashing it...

 

But unfortunately accidents happen every day in our fallen world.  My mother in law was killed in a car accident that was her fault, she turned in front of a dump truck....  I remeind my husband that we don't hold the accident against his mom...we know she certainly  didn't mean for it to happen to herself!  In the same way, we have to look at the kids' accident.  It's the only way we can get through it. 

 

We promised the judge in court that we would forever love the girls and be a REAL family to them.  That promise has never changed, in fact it is stronger now than ever.  Our whole life has revolved around our children anyhow but now even more so for Selah.  She will never be alone or neglected. 

 

And thanks to all of you....she has many people who know her name and are praying for her DAILY!  Thank you for caring about our children and espicially for all the prayers for Selah! 

 

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One year later

 

 

this morning leaving to go get Selah:)

 

 

Selah dressed in her new outfit and her AFOs waiting to go home

Steve surrounded by little people:)