Animals

Got up with great resolve to go walking while Selah was in HBOT RATHER than eating Dunking Donuts.... Well I walked THREE miles,  problem was I had Steve with me....ended up going to get an iceie  (frozen coke for you non Southern folks)  and a hamburger and onion rings.....see having KIDS will make you FAT!  LOL  I did have a small size of everything AND I did walk 3 miles. 

Then we brought her back home and my boys went to do yard work (without being asked to do so- something is UP with that!)   I'm sitting with Sarah and Jon was feeding Sam a hamburger when Shad runs in screaming "there's a cottonmouth!"   We ran outside left the little ones, sure enough there was a snake trying to climb up our big palm tree.  Steve said he was looking at two huge frogs who were on the palm tree and something fell down right beside him.  It was the snake, evidently it was looking at the frogs too!  ( BTW, when we came back inside after all the excitement, we found Sam had fed himself the hamburger we were laughing so hard!  We've been working on him feeding himself!)) 

We absolutely HATE to kill something if it's not poisonous.   So we are messing around with the snake, Steve is trying to look it up on his phone to figure out what kind it was....and the snake got away.  It was hitting at our shovel but most snakes strike when scared.  We think it was harmless or maybe a cotton mouth....I do think they like palm trees LOL!

This happened yesterday too.  Steve and Shad were taking the little ones out to the swing set and they came running back in and said there was a snake out there.  It look just like a rattler but with no rattles.  I think it was a bull snake and I let it go across the road. 

I know I'll get comments on how awful snakes are, but they are not, they keep down the rodents and non poisonous  snakes kill poisonous snakes.  We have a HUGE black snake which is aggressive but not poisonous that lives over by the graveyard.  We leave it alone because we know it won't hurt anyone and will kill bad snakes.  I like snakes, actually I like pretty much all animals with the exceptions of some insects like wasps, mosquitoes, and flies.   I LOVE GATORS!  See me wrestling this poor little gator at Gatorland back in 2011.  Actually I was afraid I'd hurt him he was so little LOL 

 

I've always loved animals, had a ton of them growing up.  We raised chickens and pigs mostly but some cattle a few times and ducks, and rabbits too.  Since I grew up I mostly just had cats and in recent years dogs too.  But we are way down on the cats since whatever got them, gave one dog away and one is very old.....  I think my animal days are getting over.  I still love animals BUT something clicked in me over the years as I see animals taken better care of than children.....

 

 

I've always fed and took our animals to the vet, a low cost one (mostly to make sure to get them "fixed" so we wouldn't have more animals)  but I never dressed them or spent lavish amounts of money on them.  I just couldn't even years ago.  Now to see stores devoted to animal care turns my stomach to be honest.  Even the commercials to stop pet abuse....I don't ever want to see an animal hurt, abused or starved BUT I'm alot more concerned about humans made in God's image than I am about animals! 

 

Not to be condemning but I really really wonder what God thinks of us spending millions of dollars on our animals and not giving much towards missions or towards human needs?  I'll be the first to be kind to animal, or stop and help a turtle off the road but .....

 

After we came home from Ukraine is when all our cats started disappearing.  I hate that anything happened to them, but I couldn't really "grieve" them after having just been exposed to so much human suffering.  I've had a cat (Bubba) who weighed more than my new 5.5 year old daughter.....  puts things into perspective doesn't it?  

 

 

I wonder what would happen if we Christians saved and gave to save an orphan.  I wonder what this world would look like if we- the ones who profess to know Christ- Put our money where our mouth was....and instead of trying to "believe God" for a bigger house, or new jewelry, we would remember our treasure is in heaven where there are mansions and streets of gold.... 

 

I don't believe in a "pauper mentality" that all Christians should take a vow of poverty.....but we don't have to worry about that teaching going through the Christian world today LOL sadly.....  I think some churches need to take a "vow of poverty".  I really have to wonder WHY we need  churches that costs millions .....  I'm not against having a nice clean church, not all BUT I also don't believe that a church should be a status symbol either!   And they do become status symbols.  I'm not against big churches at all.    A big building can be built and made into a nice place without spending so much money that could be used elsewhere. 

 

 

Guess I'm thinking today that one day we will all have to answer to how we spent our time, our talents and our treasures.....  

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Selah had a better night.  She went to sleep at 5pm and slept till 3am then her heart rate went up quite a bit.  Her nurse gave her some valium and she was able to go back to sleep.  They looked at her ears this morning and the redness in one ear is less.  We had put some over the counter remedies in there and I guess it helped!

Please keep her in prayer.  We are on day 9..... still not seeing anything new.  Jon took her this afternoon to HBOT.    He just got back and did say she was moving around a bit more than usual in the chamber.  thank you for your prayers!

Feeling Low

Last night Selah had a rough night.  She didn't sleep any and her heart rates were up.  Thankfully we had nursing or I'd be falling out today!  We are hoping this is just an anomaly.  Every now and then  she has a funky night and nothing comes out of it.  We are hoping for that!  She has no other symptoms.    When we took her to HBOT, they checked her ears and one ear was a bit red.  I called our pediatrician but since she has no fever and no real symptoms he wasn't too concerned.  I have to take the restlessness with a grain of salt as she has that ever now and then for no apparent reason.    Steve and I went to Dunking Donuts and a couple of cake donuts with chocolate  icing made me feel a little better. 

 

 

Then we went by the pharmacy and got all kinds of remedies for the ears.  She seems to have a lot of wax build up too. So we got it all to see if anything would help.  the director seemed to think the wax is so much it might be making her ears uncomfortable when she has a HBOT treatment.  She never makes a face and she will do that if anything hurts or annoys her.

 

 

Then it was time for Jon to take her for her afternoon HBOT and the little kids went out to swing. 

Sam LOVES to listen to Steve's phone or Ipod.  He loves all kinds of Christian music but adores RAP!  LOL!   Lecrea is his favorite and  mine too! 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

These pictures were taken last night....

Sam was trying to "help" Sarah....right off the horse LOL

 

 

 

 

 

Is this adorable or what?  Look at that mischievous smile. 

 

Don't worry he was redirected to play on his car!  Sarah was the ruling princess. 

 

 

 

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Today I just feel so low.  I read a bit about HBOT and all kinds of claims that some families have made.  I want that for Selah.  It just makes me mad and upset not to see any change in her!  I MISS Selah!  I want her back.  I'm thankful for little changes and stableness but I want her back to me.  For whatever reason today is very hard for me.  All I can say is we are putting one foot in front of the other and doing everything humanly possible for her.  There is nothing else we can do , she is too unstable and we have too much sense to take her to Timbuktoo for stem cell injections....   We've done everything that anyone has suggested (within reason of course!) 

 

But we are still going forward.  If she gets no better, it will not be because we haven't tried everything we could for her.  Yes she is still on fish oil, if you are wondering.  She still smells like the Little Mermaid.  We will do whatever we can to help her.  And we will always take care of her to the best of our ability.  I just want to see some changes!

 

Today it seems the heavens are brass to me.  I've called out to God so many times, sometimes in my sleep or just awake state to heal Selah.  I've asked Him not to leave her like this, for this NOT to be the end of the story.  This can't be IT!

 

Please keep praying for Selah. 

 

 

I'm Thankful

Whew I went to bed at 10 pm last night and still am tired!  I got up early and took Shad with me to the grocery store.  Shad has the next few days off from school (teacher days and Veteran's  Day).   I am a PUBLIX girl and that's where I buy my "real" food from.  So he was pushing the buggy for me and asked "if he looked like a grownup"  he seemed to think the lady at Walmart thought he was a grown up LOL.  He likes to go shopping with me cuz he usually ends up with a treat if it's just him and me:)  And he got one or two treats:)

Our nurse took Selah to HBOT once I got home and the little ones had PT.  Selah got home in time for her PT before turning around and going back to HBOT.  The PT got her very stretched out, great range of motion. 

Selah pooped BIG last night on her own with no medicine:)  Her night nurse was very happy and I am too!!!   We talk about poop a lot around here, for the most part I do not put that discussion on my blog LOL  But this is a cause for celebration!

Today is day 7 of HBOT and we still haven't seen anything "different".  Please keep praying for her.  We'd love to see some good change!  And I know you all would too!  Thanks for all your concern and prayers!

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You know I'm reading all the "Thanksgiving posts" on FB this time of year.  I have a few very sarcastic friends and one of them posted this picture.....

 

I just thought that was too funny.  Didn't really think it might offend anyone,(probably cause not too much offends me)  but when I went to save the picture I saw there was a huge debate going on with the original poster of this picture.  I still think it's funny.  In my group of friends, I've noticed the ones who are writing something that they are thankful for everyday of this month are generally the ones who are thankful all year long:) 

 

 

In spite of our circumstances, I am still thankful for the life I have, my children, my husband, our church, our friends, our home.....  I wrote on here, soon after the accident that I didn't think I'd ever be truly deep down happy again...ever....  and I'm not.  Even on the BEST days, there is a corner of my heart that is so sad, that I could cry if I didn't control myself.....but I am content and have joy. 

 

Joy is different than happiness.  Happiness is based on what is going on around you or happening to you.  There is nothing in this world that could happen to me, including winning the biggest lottery in the world, that would truly make me 100% happy again as long as Selah is still not healed.  Oh I could have fun and laugh but there will always be a part of my heart that would be sad.

 

Joy is deeper than happiness.  For me, Joy is something deep down that doesn't change due to my circumstances.  It's what there in the morning when I wake up and memories sweep over me.  It helps me to remember this world is not our home. 

 

God has really helped me to deal with anxiety, it's been almost 2 months since I've had to take a pill to ward off an anxiety attack,   Those attacks were pretty regular for awhile.  I have no pride in saying that GOD has helped me.  Living the life I live, I get through it with God's help.  And I don't just live to "get through it"   I'm a mom to 4 other kids.  I don't want them to remember me as someone who was so devastated by life that I couldn't love them with all my heart and have fun!   We still have fun.  We laugh a lot, we enjoy things together.....but there is always a missing piece.  That will never change

 

Having a child that has been so injured and changed by an accident is not something anyone prepares for or thinks about going through.  To say "it's hard" would be the grossest understatement of the year!  There is really no way of adequate explaining that nor the past year of my life.  I'm surprised I'm still standing to be quite honest. 

 

I'm not a super Christian,  but God has given me the grace to live through this past year and three months.  When I look ahead, the road looks very hard.  When I look back, the road looks awful and dark.  I have not been able to go back and read any of my blogs, ever....I also can not handle looking at the pictures from the accident time through the time we got home last January.  It's like I want to forget those 6 months.  Occasionally some of the pictures will come up on my computer background and even the nice pictures are like a dagger in my heart.  There are things I don't even remember, sometimes someone will mention something and I have no memory of it at all.  I was just literally putting one foot in front of the other for months. 

 

But God was with me and He still is and I'm thankful.  

Running

Sarah and Selah had appointments with GI (gastro) that had been scheduled for awhile so Selah didn't go to HBOT this morning.  We took the girls to Lakeland.  Our GI doctor has offices all over.  Usually in Lakeland, we don't have to wait very long, NOT today....we waited and waited....  Finally got in....we had a lot to discuss for both girls.  I'll start with Sarah.

When we got home from Ukraine, Sarah weighed only 19 pounds, she was 5.5 years old, a little bag of bones.  We got home at midnight and had her to the doctor at 9 am this next morning.  He ran all the usual tests and we began setting up all the specialists for her to see.  All the basic tests were actually ok, despite her obvious malnourishment.  She had a terrible vitamin D defiency   from never getting out in the sun.  So we set up all her specialists appointments for September thinking we'd be home from NY by then.  Well we know how that went....   So today I finally got her into see GI.  Sarah has DOUBLED her weight since coming home, she is 40 pounds:)   Still very small for a girl who is almost 7 years old but much bigger than when we got her.  Sarah is the "Poop Queen" she poops 4 to 5 times a day, very loose and very stinky.  She has a lot of gas both ways.....  so we've worried about her but she is never sick and has gained plenty of weight.  She also eats everything pureed.  The doctor is doing some tests on her and has put her on an antibodic, just to clear out her GI tract in case something is lurking from Ukraine.  Sarah has always had a smell to her, it's not unpleasant but it is different-sort of a sweet smell.  But she has no issues with her sugar.  It's her skin that smells.   I've mentioned it to doctors here and there but no one has been too worried.  The GI doc is not too worried either as she has been so very healthy but did mention some metabolic disorders that we can test for.  Stuff like that scares me.  We are starting with some of these tests and the medicine and then will go from there with things.

Selah is doing great with GI, she has lost some weight since we changed formula but it's ok.,  We weren't worried about it, the pedisure made her very puffy.  We've had all kinds of issues getting some supplies and her formula.  He wrote out orders for everything we need so hopefully it will all get straighten out.

 Then we drove back home, dropped off food for Steve and Sam and dropped off Sarah and took Selah to HBOT.  I got her set in there and went and picked up Shad.  I got back with him and it was time to take Selah home.....

I got home, put together a casserole and am doing this blog before I fall asleep!!!!!!  What a busy day!

Yes I have vague memories of the days before we had kids....very very vague memories.....


Selah will make up this morning's session and have an extra morning of HBOT at the end.  We normally wouldn't miss but we really had to get in and have all her stuff straightened out and Sarah needed to see the doctor too.

So friends I am really tired tonight.  Thank you all for your prayers.  Thank you for your emails and comments on here.  I really LOVE hearing from you!!!!!!

My Day

This time change is GREAT! The clock wasn't changed in my room so I jumped up frantic at 8:50 (really 7:50 am) this morning because the PT would be here in 10 minutes and the kids weren't up! Well since she doesn't come till 9am we were GOOD! Got the kids up, changed, breakfasted, put chili in the crock pot for tonight, got myself all ready....all before 9 am:) I think I'll leave the clocks alone LOL

Then we had a little scare with Selah.  Our nurse took her to HBOT but was back in just a few minutes, her "mickey" gtube had come out!  Ever so often the balloon inside breaks.  Either it reacts to the fish oil or we just got a batch of bad ones.  So then he left again with her.  She still got all her therapy time in.  Our weekday nurse is able to take her for me in the mornings which really helps out.  Friday-Sunday we have go with the nurse to help transport her.  I really appreciate our day nurse for taking her by himself, it really frees me up!  I go in the afternoons.

We haven't seen anything new with Selah but we are still waiting.

I should share that last weekend, before she started HBOT on Friday she went poop with no medicine!  And has been pooping ever since on her own!  We are all very happy about that!  I don't think it had anything to do with HBOT since she started the early morning before she went in for her first treatment but boy are we proud of her!   There had been a little talk about wondering if her gut was somewhat shutting down some....  Glad that doesn't seem to be the case!

Please keep her in prayer!!!!


Today after school Shad and I went to Walmart.  It was "big" purchase trip meaning all the big things, the waters, the dog food, cat food, big bags (40 pound) of salt for our water treatment (if you have well water you understand) paper towels, toilet paper. and baby wipes (we buy the big boxes LOL) and paper plates and bowls.  We had 2 buggies when we got to the cashier, I got there first and helped move Shad's buggy behind me.    A lady was coming up as I was doing this.  This lady asked me in an odd way if he was with me or waiting for his mother.  You know I understand he is Asian but that really ticked me off.  I told her quite sharply that I WAS his mother.  Shad starts snickering...    THEN she asked if she could go ahead, granted we did have 2 buggies but they were big things and a quick scan, she on the other hand had a buggy filled with all kinds of things.  I told her NO.    I'm sure someone will think I'm just a witch but I felt slightly insulted and I was quite tired because I wore heels with my jeans and just did not feel like being nice!!!!  She grumbled and walked off.   Everyone around me started laughing....at least that made me feel better and not like I was acting too much like a witch.  The guy ahead of me turned and just shook his head at her and then said "the nerve of some people"  That made me feel like better although right then I just didn't care too much. 

WOW have I been really honest in my last couple of posts....and yet no mean responses LOL! When I am open about something we are currently dealing with like Sam's self hurting/anxiety or my issue with Steve's game systems, I feel really really vulnerable.  It's not so bad when I share something that happened years ago....but something that is not resolved is harder for me to share about.  Thanks for being nice :) 

I'm still in amazement DAILY as I see all the hits this blog gets.....I just don't understand WHY people read it.  I'm really grateful just amazed that anyone ever comes back:)   LOL   I know I don't get 2000 NEW people every day so I have to assume that many people come back daily and read it.   I average between 2,000 and 3,000 hits a day....  It blows me away!    Actually it scares me some too!  When I read over my blog posts, I wonder what people think about what I share.  My fear is I am such a train wreck that people just can't help coming back to see what new stupid thing I wrote LOL!!!!     I  do LOVE getting emails and messages from you guys.   Please feel free to email me.  I respond to each email. 


I've talked here about The Shepherd Crook Ministry .  They had a listing for Shad back when we adopted him.  they list, fund raise and advocate for special needs kids who are harder to find families for.  It's led by Scott and Kathy Rosenow who just inspire me daily!

Here is a picture of them with their family that are still at home.  Scott's the tall guy and Kathy is right beside him in orange.  Most of their younger kids are adopted, several with special needs.  They have older children who are married and carrying on their family's tradition by adopting.  It is a beautiful thing!




Well they made an announcement today....you can read it here....  http://us5.campaign-archive2.com/?u=f14884e6c88d4b68239654ec5&id=fba2e06953&e=9c7b6bfa20     they are adopting AGAIN....Below is the picture of the lucky little girl who will be joining their family!

 

"who me?"

 

 

 

she has many medical needs and will need a lot of care

 

If you could give towards this adoption, it would be a great thing.  You can look at their link and it will tell you how to be able to give to be a part of this.

 

 

I know I bring up many situations where you can be a part of things by giving.   I LOVE to give towards adoption, just to be a part of a child finding a family is a great feeling!  And I really do think you will have a reward in heaven for giving towards adoption of special needs kids or any kid....  I guess having walked into orphanages and seen all I have seen,  I KNOW God does not want those children to live and die like that... Just heard today of a baby passing away, with no medical care....so sad.   So go to their link and think/pray about giving to this wonderful family!!!  They cared about Shad many years ago and fought to see that he had a family.....  I appreciate that very much!

 

 

 

 

Challenges of parenting!

So I have a very funny Shad story....  he was our usher on Sunday for the offering for orphans.....unbeknownst to me was his method of being an usher.   His method, I was told by my husband, who was laughing hysterically, was to stand in front of each parishioner until they gave!  We did talk to him last night about the correct gracious way to take up an offering, however we were still laughing so much about it that I'm not sure he paid us much attention!   Shad is such a funny guy:)   Love that boy! 

Our wonderful nurse took Selah this morning to HBOT so I could do paperwork and I did do some!  I FINALLY addressed the thank you cards to all the people who helped us in our insurance fight!  It was not the easiest thing to get the governor's address LOL.  I also paid bills, that is a good thing to do and on time.  I HATE paying bills, not just because it makes our bank account go down, I just hate the chore of it!  I did a bunch of calls for various things....left messages all medical, finally got one call back today. 

The kids had PT and OT today in between Selah's therapies.  Then it was time for her to go back to HBOT.  I had time to drop her off and go in for a few minutes before going to get Shad.  In those few minutes, the discussion turned to food and then to DOUGHNUTS.    I fought temptation hard but when I picked up Shad I asked his opinion and he really thought we should go and buy doughnuts!  Thank God because I was craving them so bad!   We bought a dozen and took them back to HBOT.  I didn't know if the health conscious staff would eat any....they did LOL! 

Steve is working hard on his last few books.  He wants to get a job but we told him he has to finish his books before he can get a job.  I think he will be done by Christmas or January. 

Shad made ALL A's in school, all high A's!  In just a 9 week period, he completed basically a half of year of work.  He did 5 or 6 books in each subject!   I'm very happy with his progress.  The boys use a curriculum that allows the child to work at their own pace. We'd love to see Shad finish with his curriculum early and enroll in college while still in high school.  I know he has a ways to go but it could happen!

I don't usually read too many blogs because I am afraid I will plagiarize them without meaning to do so LOL  but today I was researching something else and came across a really good blog.
http://www.smockityfrocks.com/2012/07/10-signs-your-child-might-be-spoiled-and-what-to-do-about-it.html  this lady totally cracks me up!  I read several of her posts and totally agreed with everything she said which is unusual for me LOL  This post is even better!   http://www.smockityfrocks.com/2012/06/are-your-kids-spoiled.html

Between these two posts I really started thinking.....

We expect a lot from our kids.  We hear that all the time from friends and relatives.  We expect our older boys to do chores at home and at church and to do them willingly without expecting payment or a specific reward.  We do not give allowances, we do not do rewards for them doing stuff unless you count getting pizza occasionally after a job is done as a reward.  I have told my boys that they are "working for God" when they do work at the church and that they will get their rewards in eternity LOL    Now we do fun things as a family and they get to do special things individually too at times BUT we don't usually give them the idea it is a "payback" for some specific job.  We feel like kids need to learn to work and that it is a part of life.  It's just good to learn to do things without feeling like they need to have a reward.


Recently Steve somewhat kidded around about the things he had done to help me that morning.....he changed both kids and fed them breakfast.  I told him that he should read "Little House on the Prairie"  and read how the young girls worked in the fields daily and then come and tell me about all he had done LOL!  That shut him up! 

Well months and months ago, Steve started pestering us for a specific new game system that is coming out.  I do truly HATE any type of video game and feel they are all spawns of Satan.... not because they are so evil (our kids don't get evil games) but the video games SUCK out the brains of children and teens....just suck them out and take them to outer space! 

Anyhow I gave in to him.....He has been such a great help this past year to us.  So I ordered this system and immediately regretted it!  But it was so complicated, I could not figure out how to cancel the order.  It's not that I don't appreciate my son, I really really do.  But I don't think this was the best way to show appreciation!   And I HATE anything to do with video games! 

He thinks it is the best way for us to show our appreciation to him......

Such a dilemma, after I read this blog I automatically felt like a bad mother!  I really don't want my kids to get an entitlement mindset!  

I'm still not in a happy place with this whole thing....I don't like to do things where I don't feel peace about it.  On one hand of course I love making my kids happy....but on the other hand, I don't want them to get their brains sucked out anymore than they are have had LOL!  Plus it was more expensive than I anticipated, of course Steve had an answer for that too since we didn't do much of a Christmas the last two years and he didn't complain at all.  We didn't do anything much  for his birthday last year so he succeeded in making me think this was a 2 Christmas and 2 birthday presents combined!   Let me tell you, he is good....

UGH!!!!   I'm not happy with myself!  This blog really made me think. Take the time to read it.

I am thankful, I think we have made good choices with parenting our kids.   There are a few things that I would change if I could go back and the number one thing would be video games- there would be NONE in our home!  You have no idea but VG are the bane of my existence and I have no one to blame but ourselves!!!  I know we could still yank them and sell them all but then a small part of me thinks how much Steve and Shad enjoy them and of course I like my kids to enjoy things....but.... we set limits with them and they are pretty compliant.  So this is the dilemma, that I'm still going through.  I like to give things to make my kids happy and be happy at the same time and I'm not!

The complications of being a parent!

The blog actually gave me some really good tips about how to get young children to sit still in church.  Sam totally loves church and sits on the front row right by the aisle so he is right in front of the pulpit.  It is unreal to see him come in and sit himself down.  He is extremely well behaved in church and actually seems to respond.   It took some years of me working with him gently. 

Sarah LOVES the music.  Since we sit on the front row, I let her twirl on the floor.  No one can really see her and she doesn't disturb anyone.  She generally will sit either in a chair or on the floor by my leg for most of the service.  However she has started doing a new thing.  She touches everything, which is good.  But she touches things by lightly hitting them.  We are working on this.  But sometimes she will hit the stage area and it picks up on the sound system.  Usually I have to take her out about mid way the sermon.  I've been taking her to the office where I can still hear and letting her play on the floor.  The blog gives the suggestion that when you take a small child out of service, don't allow any playtime or then the child will think "I'll make noise, get to go out and play"  That was a light bulb moment for me!  So now if I take Sarah out, she'll have to sit on my lap and not get down in the office.  I think she understands enough that once it doesn't become fun, she won't want to do it.  

We don't feel our little ones (Sam and Sarah and obviously Selah) should be spanked.  I don't have a problem with spankings, I think it helps to remind kids to behave but I also think the child should be fully able to understand spankings.  With them (and of course Selah too before the accident) we mostly "disciplined" them by removing them from the situation.  I have tried putting Sam in a "time out" before in his crib and all he did was fall asleep LOL.   Because of Sarah's situation, coming from where she did, with the understanding she has, I could never use" time out " for her.   That would be too much like rejection for her I believe.  With her if I say NO she does seem to understand and will stop the behavior (like the light hitting) for a few minutes at least.  It's challenging to train up special needs children with low mental understanding.    BUT I've seen some special needs adults who had NO discipline or anyone ever saying NO and they were brats and very hard to deal with.  I believe children crave order in their lives. 

Sam can be very impatient for things like food and we have catered to him probably a bit too much in the past.  He can be very demanding and we've always tried to meet his needs quickly so he didn't get upset.  It has seemed like that makes him even more demanding!

Sam has always "bit" on a finger, for years he has done this.  Then he began biting the same finger on the other hand.  We've worked with him and tried various things, mostly trying to do whatever we could NOT to frustrate him.

Well we have noticed since we came back home a newer level of frustration with him.  Now he sometimes bites the top of his one hand.  Occasionally, he has pinched himself   (he used to pinch us if he was mad)  and recently he brings both hands together and pushes on his forehead to the point he has a red spot. 

Our PT suggested more out door time and "brushing him"  I've been doing that pretty consistently for about 2 weeks now with no real change in Sam.  I set an appointment with his neurologist to talk about this.  I think Sam is dealing with anxiety and while I am not one to want to medicate myself or a child, I want to see what the doctor says about all of this.  We had talked a couple of years ago about the finger biting and the doctor basically told me to just keep him busy and keep the frustration level as low as possible, which we have done. 

I think, we may try a light anxiety medicine if the doctor thinks that is the way to go and then while he is on the meds, try really working with him to find other ways of dealing with frustration.  It is hard when your child is non verbal.   Looking at the situation, I really think we did wrong in catering to him as much as we have done.  Now if we do anything "out of schedule" he gets so upset.  he is an easy going child in many ways, but there are things that really upset him.  One thing that is hysterically funny is if anything changes the order of the church service.....one time I was sharing several prayer requests and he started making his "unhappy sound"  It was like he was saying "sit down and shut up and let daddy get on with the service!"  He did the same thing last Sunday as I was sharing about Orphan Sunday LOL  He knows the order of the service and he doesn't like that to change.  He also does NOT like if the service is late getting started.  Sometimes Jon will be a few minutes late since he does a service at the prison before our church service and Sam will get very frustrated (so does Mama LOL)  I've told our music minster to "just go ahead and start the service, Sam is mad"  LOL  it's really funny in those situations but it is something we need to work on with him.  We had tried a communication board/system before and he didn't understand it.  I think we are going to try one again and see if his level of understanding has gotten to a place where he could communicate with us.  It could be he is frustrated by not being able to communicate his wants/needs to us. 

Sarah has no behaviors like Sam does despite all the years in a mental institution! 

Again the complications and challenges  of being a parent!



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So today is day 4 of HBOT, we haven't seen any changes with Selah except she seems exhausted!  This time around the morning and afternoon sessions are much closer together and I don't think she likes it at all!  If we do it again, I'll try to get better times for her. 

 Last time it was on day 10 I think, that she started the tongue movement so we'll see what happens next week.  Please keep praying for our sweet LaLa! 

Sunday Post.... GRACE CHURCH

 

 

Sam had a new outfit and Sarah had a new dress that a friend had sent so Steve took some pictures before church for me since I was gone with Selah to HBOT.

 

 

 

 

these two are so my twins:)

 

 

 

 

So when the nurse and I got to the HBOT clinic, THIS van was parked there....LOL

 

 

 

 

I just have to say IF marijuana was ACTUALLY prescribed like any other dangerous drug that would be ok with me.  BUT we can look at the states that have legalized it "for medical purposes" and see that soon it becomes legal for recreational purposes....  They seem NOT to hold anyone accountable.    While we were getting Selah into the van to leave, a lady came up to take a picture and she was ALL for it.  However to be quite honest, having worked with drug addicts for years, it was obvious the lady had had some issues in that area.....probably within the last few hours......    The nurse and I just rolled out eyes and got Selah into her car seat !  LOL

 

We got back to the church in time for me to share about Orphan Sunday.  If you know me, I do NOT cry in front of people....unless I am talking about my little ones or Orphans....so this morning I bawled as I shared about the two orphans I am committed to raise funds and find families for. Our church gave over $150 with more to come. I appreciate the fact that they have opened their hearts to something they really didn't know much about before the last couple of years. Sometimes I hear of churches not getting behind families who are adopting or they don't want to know about the world outside their 4 walls...I'm so thankful Grace Church of Zephyrhills Fl is not like that!! Our church has changed and grown so much over the past 7.5 years. We are so blessed to have lived through the changes (LOL) Looking over an almost full church this morning, seeing folks wipe their eyes as I shared our story ..... it was a blessing!!!!

 

We are so excited about our church.  I know I've mentioned it before but we came to a small, dying, physically falling down, "Sanford & Son" train wreck ...  The few families here, were all inter related and nothing had changed in 25 years.  The buildings were really almost falling down, there was a back addition to the church that was leaning, holes on the church's platform, pews that had so much termite damage that between services a new pile of sawdust would be on the old RED carpet.  We hauled off over 5 dump truck loads of just plain trash the first couple of months we were here....it was unreal! 

 

Then as the years went by, God began to do some things.  One of the things was to move out some people.  I can love and care about folks, but still know they needed to find another church home. One reason was some folks had never seen or experienced much of the Christian world outside this church.  They were taught that this little church was the beginning and ending of their spiritual life. In other words, for them to go to another church would almost, if not be a sin.  Some folks came here just out of tradition, there was no deep relationship with God nor any Christian growth that was evident.  Sometimes folks need to be challenged.  Now I am all about being faithful to a church and having a church home BUT you can never cling to a specific church or exalt a specific pastor above God.   I think it is almost always a good thing for a church when the church loses people.....that sounds funny coming from a pastor's wife right???   LOL  Over the years, we feel like God has pruned our church.  It's not always been the easiest thing but it has been a good thing. 

 

When we took the church almost 8 years ago, we didn't' think we'd be here that long.   Jon has always had various ministerial offers but we felt we could help out for a while.  Then as we began really focusing on the church, God really started giving us a vision for this church.  Before anything could happen, God used some circumstances to basically empty the church LOL.  That was not the funniest time but we knew that God had something bigger for this church and we realized that sometimes things or people have to CHANGE to CHANGE!

 

We just determined to stay faithful to what God had set before us.  We never defined ourselves, this church by numbers or by situations.

 

God worked HUGE miracles to provide all the necessary labor and building supplies to totally redo the whole campus.   We made a decision that blew some folks away to give back a large donation that had been given to the church for seemingly selfish/control purposes... I can laugh about it now but when I dropped that check in the mailbox.....I thought I'd throw up LOL!!!!!!  Maybe not that bad but......   My husband said "God will provide or the church will fall down...."   guess what? It didn't fall down:) 

 

God has been faithful!

 

We had this great new renovated church and fellowship hall....but it was rather empty!

 

So what did we do?  We just put it in God's hands.  In the books of Acts, the bible says "God added to the church daily, those who were to be saved"  In the evangelical world there are all kinds of "programs" and "philosophies" about church growth.  They just ring false to us.  I don't' say that they are evil programs or philosophies  but we are not comfortable with using them. 

 

We just kept being faithful to what God had told us to do.  Pastor the church, pastor the prison, take care of orphans, love folks into the kingdom.....

 

Then we were gone to Ukraine and then the accident happened and we were gone for almost 6 months to NY.....  we had a couple of great guys who filled in for us while we were gone but they had other jobs/ministries they couldn't devote a lot of time to the church.  Jon and I discussed it ONCE while Selah was sick....  Jon said "God will take care of it or it will close"  ( You see how he thinks huh?)    We didn't really worry about things, there was nothing we could do anyhow....

 

It didn't' close....

 

We came home, there was some more pruning.....

 

THEN....God began doing some amazing things....really amazing things.... 

 

We have a "Family Intergrated Church" philosophy.... actually it USED to be called, the whole family going to church together until churches began offering children's church and teen church during regular church times.  Over the past 4 or 5 years, the whole idea of a children's church or a teen church became worrisome to us.  When we first came here, we looked for both a youth pastor and a children's pastor.  We did have one children's pastor who really pastored the kids and she is now a missionary.  But other than her, it just was not a good situation, we never felt good about the kids being out of church.  We had a youth pastor.....let's just say....DIASTER in so many ways....   And we really started thinking, praying and looking at things.  We began to see that separating the children and youth is "new thing" in the church world.  It started in the 70's and now most Christian churches have children's church during the main worship time and often have a youth church also.  If we look back on the decline of the young adults in church, it can so easily be traced back to the advent of the separation of kids and their families.  Now we are not militant but we look back to how we were raised, in church with our families...not in some little room coloring or hearing a little story.  We were in church worshipping and learning with our families. 

 We feel that is probably the best way for children/teens to learn about God, it worked for centuries in the church world.......

 

 

Wikiped defines Family Intergrated Church as

A family integrated church is one in which parents and children ordinarily attend church services together, children stay all through church services without attending Sunday school or children's ministries, and organized groups and activities for children and youth are normally non-existent. Other terms used are family discipleship churches, family-centered ministry and inclusive-congregational ministry.^[1]
A spectrum of such churches exist with some completely eliminating all age-segregation and others allowing for some in certain contexts. Although segregation may take place during weekday events, family-integrated churches are generally united in having children in the main worship service.^[2] Timothy Paul Jones notes that in the family-integrated ministry model, "all age-graded classes and events are eliminated."^[3] Family integrated churches emphasise inter-generational ministry and the "parents' responsibility to evangelize and disciple their own children."^[1] Some advocates base this on the idea that families are the "God-ordained building blocks of the church."

 

 

We came to this idea on our own, then we were told it is a whole movement LOL!  We've done things this way for at least 3 years and really see fruit in our kids' lives.  Now we have other families coming with their kids.  It's great! 

 

Then we had a couple move here who have a motorcycle ministry.  Then we had the privilege of partnering with a Spanish church to provide services.  Then we had a couple who went to a main line church who just wanted go deeper start coming and now they are starting a Sunday school class.   We had families make new commitments to attend the church in order to grow the kingdom. 

 

It's been an incredible few months.  No we're not running in the hundred's yet....but we run above 30 serious believers every week, now for a few months....we're reaching folks through prison ministry, orphan ministry, Missions, that may never attend our church but we are serious about Kingdom building....not building our own little kingdom.    What I love is almost everyone who has become a part of our church have just moved to the area, or just got serious with God or are seeking a deeper type of walk.....  No one has come because they were mad a preacher or didn't like something that happened in their church!   One time we had a family visit our church and all they did was bad mouth another pastor. I told them they needed to go and make things right with the pastor and the church and that we were not interested in building a church full of disgruntled church attenders LOL   Jon said I'd do well to read "How to win friends and influence people"  We actually just laughed about it.  Recently a friend of mine (who is much like me....I know that is scary!) was told the same thing...and she replied "I have enough friends and Jesus can influence the others" LOL

 

So we feel like we are at the beginning of something really great happening here!   Jon & I are all about reaching out to the ones that society forgets about....the prisoners, the orphans, the widows, the drug addicts, the "strangers", the elderly, the disabled....I don't share that in a prideful way, but that is where our focus in ministry has always been and sometimes it has been lonely reaching out to folks that no one else cared much about.  I don't know if lonely is the right word but as far as other ministers, for the most part, don't "get" us....    We loved the ministry that God has given us, it's just not many others were that excited about it.   We don't have any enemies (that I know of LOL) but we've just been "different" from the beginning.   I think most of the ministers who know us like us very much, they just don't understand our focus.....

 

But we are doing what God has put on our hearts to do and it is exciting!

 

So we are looking towards the future here at Grace Church!  Come join us if you are in this area!