Longer than...

Today was just a good day.  Nothing earth shaking but good.  Our regular main night nurse works Sunday during the day and I really enjoy her.  We went to HBOT then I got back in time to hear the end of my husband's sermon and "meet & greet".  One of our "snowbird" couples just returned for the winter season and everyone is talking about our church's plans for the holidays:)  We are also starting an adult Sunday School class in January.  We were a very traditional church when we first came here with a Sunday School teacher reading from a book.  Then for awhile as we were in our rebuilding stage (both physically and spiritually) we canceled Sunday School.  We've not been in a hurry to "make something happen" but God brought in the right folks at the right time.  It is so exciting to see what all has happened here in the last six months! 

After service and lots of chatting, a bunch of us went to a fast food restaurant.  since it was time for Selah's appointment, we had to take 2 vans to take everyone at the same time including the nurse.  This was the first time our whole family left the house together since the day we left for New York back in August 2012, bittersweet.....

Selah did HBOT while we ate then we picked them up and came home.  My husband's brother was able to be with us today.  He has a very demanding law enforcement job and the past few weeks have been crazy for him.  It was so good for all of us to be together again.  Nothing like family and friends! 

We just all hung out together today, the kids played outside....it was all good! 

Selah was very relaxed today, I love it when she is so peaceful!


So this was a quick pic I snapped after church.  all the kids except the big one are wearing their consignment clothes.   Sam was quite annoyed became he was ready to go eat!!!!  But doesn't he look cute:)  Selah was resting in between HBOT and I wasn't dressed for Sunday pictures LOL  Seeing just Steve with his little bros and sister reminds me how much older he is than they are LOL

 

 

 

 

Looking at the calendar I realized that I have now been married LONGER than I was single.  I was 24 and one month when I got married and now have been married 24 years and one month !  That is a bit freaky to me:)  Today we were talking about how FAST life goes by....

 

So many friends of mine are becoming grandparents and losing their own parents....almost daily I'm reminded of that on FB.  Life goes on.....  It seems so hard to think that one day this portion of my life will be over.  Actually it's hard for me to think one day my life will be over, done and gone....  Makes me think about what I am doing now for God and for my family.  There is nothing else that really matters in life.  I want to serve God with the rest of my life and I want to love my family deeply.  I love my little ragtag group:) 

 

I read a survey of nurses who worked Hospice and one of the MAIN things people regretted at their death was not spending time with their family.  I certainly don't want to have that regret. 

 

Please keep praying for Selah, we still see no real change but we are still going strong:)  We will give it everything we have and then leave the results up to God. 

Consignment Shop shopping!

Today was such a rainy day that we canceled HBOT.  We don't have a covered garage and didn't want to take Selah out in the rain.  Since the therapy was canceled, I went to the consignment shop.  Like I said, I go through our stuff quite regularly and usually just give away whatever we don't use.  This time I am going through the shed where we keep all our things in order to make room for things we've had to keep in the church since the boys' lost their room to Selah.  So I am in a "get rid of anything that hasn't been used in the last month"   My goal is to have our sheds and the church/fellowship hall and our home in great condition by the first of January. I cleaned out the worst of it yesterday, now I just have to do some rearranging and everything will fit.....   (that means our kayaks won't be in the corner of the church nursery anymore....)   Since we came home in January, some things have just had to be let go because I didn't have the time needed to do all the rearranging of things.  I can't stand things disorganized whether it is a shed or a room!  Life is getting back into a routine and I'm able to get all the little things done now FINALLY!

 Since a friend of mine works at one of the shops, I decided to go there and see what they had!  WOW!  Have you ever been to a "Once Upon a Child"?  I went to the one in Brandon and couldn't believe how nice things were!  I bought ALL of Sam and Sarah's' Christmas presents. I don't think I've ever got so many nice LOUD NOISY Light up toys before.  I found great toys that I've never seen before.  Some will actually help them in learning letters.    The place was amazing, the prices were good.  I took in quite a bit of things and got a good store credit.  I got something for everyone BUT poor old Steve:)  Seems they didn't have a lot of things for an almost 6 FT bearded 18 year old LOL   I got a ton of clothes for the kids.  http://www.onceuponachild.com/  BTW I "sold"  the high chair....Sam sits in a chair now and Sarah sits on my lap so that freed up a nice corner in our kitchen.  I'm all about having more room in our tiny home!

I had a few things they didn't take (car seats) so I took them to another Consignment shop  Lil Sprouts   http://www.mylilsprouts.com/  They were also nice, took my other things and I found some outfits there for the kids. 

Then I had to go home and do grocery shopping......

One thing I haven't done this fall is put in my garden, I want to, but it -the whole idea of it- just overwhelms me.  I just do not feel like I can take on any more responsibility right now.  I'm done, up to the top.....but I miss my fresh cheap veggies!

Well some ladies from our Spanish church came and cleaned the church!  YEAH!!!!  It is so nice and sweet smelling!  And I didn't have to do it!  I think that makes it smell even better ! 


Selah had a nice relaxing day, her heart rate is in the 50's LOL  she is so glad to be home  Our nurse got her up in her stander and did some range of motion with her.  After it stopped raining the nurse took her outside for about 2 hours.  I'm glad we had such rain this morning so she could have a break, I think she needed it.

Please keep my girl in your prayers, she is never out of my mind, no matter what I'm physically doing.  Driving home from Brandon I thought about calling a friend, but instead I called on my FRIEND who sticks closer than a brother or sister....sometimes you just need to be able to pour out your heart to Him.  The one thing I've learned going through the past year is that He will always listen and He's close to a broken heart.....

Day 15 HBOT

The cleaning bug hit me full force today.....I cleaned out one of the church's sheds, the largest one that I hadn't been in for over a year....We have some things in there and I wanted to pull out all our Christmas stuff.  We haven't decorated for the last few years.  Last year our sweet friends put up a tree for us at our hotel.  the year before we did little for Christmas being so focused on the adoption.  I had promised the kids that the NEXT year was going to be a big one....well....that didn't' happen.  We haven't put up a tree since Sam was almost 3 and starting to walk.  We were afraid he'd hurt himself on it.  So this year we are going to get a BIG tree and put it in the church.  We are going to use all our ornaments and things but have it there so my little people aren't ever alone in a room with a big tree and lots of ornaments LOL

Anyhow you know how when you start cleaning and then you see something else that needs to be done???  That was how it was today.  Steve helped me all morning and then Shad took over after he got home from school.  He is all about decorating for Christmas, Steve is like an old man LOL, a GRUMPY one when it comes to doing anything like that!    I'm not big into doing stuff but I feel a little bad that we haven't done much the last few years and kids do like that.  So this year will be fun!


In between working I've started reading a big history book on WWII.  I am just fascinated by the WWII era.  When we were in Ukraine, we went to their big WWII museum and we also went to a huge battle field in the Donesk region.  It was so interesting to me.  I think about our girls and their grand parents/great grandparents and all they suffered through over the years.    And I think of how the world's history shaped our family.....pretty deep stuff!


Day 15 of HBOT and we are still doing it.,  Jon took Selah today while I worked.  A reader comforted me by reminding me we don't know what is going on with Selah's cells.....I'm praying she is right!!!!  Please keep praying for Selah!!!!!  Thank you!

Another busy day

Another busy day, I guess I could use that title just about every day.  Today Selah and Sarah had speech evaluations.  Selah's was short, just had to prove she could hear by making noise and seeing her respond.  One SMALL thing I've noticed lately is if you make noise she will eventually turn towards the noise.  She did not use to do that at all and we were told to watch for that at the "rehab" she was at.  She did quite well in turning towards the noises today.

Sarah did wonderfully and won hearts as always.  I didn't mention this the other day but for her first assement the therapist called her over and she didn't respond.  So the therapist said "oh she doesn't know her name or to come when called"  and me being the smart butt that I can be sometimes when I'm a little annoyed, said "no she knows her name and will come but not to you."  so I called her and she hopped right over to me.  (I was really glad she did not ignore me LOL)  I really hate assesments and evaluations, it's not like I'm stupid, I know where my kids are at and it is ok, I just don't want anyone else to say where they are at!   But today was very positive! 

As I said Sarah was charming and the therapist said that Sarah has a lot of potential, more than what anyone has noted before.  She feels Sarah may wind up with some commutative language skills:)  Things were very positive and are moving along.....

Then Sarah had PT and got to show off her skills:)  BTW she can go from her walker, and hop her bottom into the swing ALL on her OWN!!!!!!   She just started being able to do that!  That girl is amazing!

Then Selah had PT and left for HBOT with the nurse and then Sam had his vision assessment for vision therapy.  Sarah will be having her's on Monday. 

So as always we had people in and out of our house and working with our kids. 

It is hard to have so many people in and out of your home on a daily basis but it's worth it since it helps the kids.  I say it is like living in a REAL reality show!  Nothing is scripted....  they see the REAL Clantons LOL!  So we have a full time nurse -2 a day/night shift.  Then we have our PT 3x a week for 2 hours each time.  And we have our OT here once a week for at least 2 hours.  Once the kids start getting services, they should have a couple hours a day of services EACH, then if you add all the various  folks here and there....it's pretty crazy!  I'm on first name basis with the UPS and Fed -Ex guys as we get so many deliveries  for the kids.

I've always though it would be FUN to have our own show, Jon thinks it would be terrible but one of our nurses SWEARS he is writing a sitcom about us LOL...SCARY!!!!!

Well we are finished with day 14 HBOT, no real change.  She does turn her head towards sound but it seems she was starting to do that already before HBOT.  She did a good job on that today while the Speech therapist was there.  Please continue to keep Selah in your prayers. 

Tomorrow is going to be a relaxing day, I hope!  This has been a busy week and next week is also.  Lots of appointments and more evaluations for the little ones.  Then the next week we go to the cabin for a few days with friends:)  Really looking forward to it, just not looking forward to all that goes into going away for a few days!!!!!!!

POOP

We have lots of poop in our house, with three in diapers, that is a topic of conversation...often!   Well I've been doing poop samples on Sarah, who has really bad smelling poop.  She always had and now this new doctor is really running a bunch of tests on it.  She poops a lot...like 4-5 times a day.  Well I have decided it is one thing to change a diaper, it is quite another thing to get in there with a tongue depressed and scoop up poop out of a diaper.  Yesterday I gagged so badly that I almost threw up!   I told Sarah that I was glad she called me Mama if I had to be doing all of this!   But it is ok, hoping they will find out what is going on with her.  The doctor is not really worried since she ha doubled in weight since we adopted her. 

So I had ALL SEVEN samples and was off to turn it in to the lab....and the lab was closed.  After all of that I had to turn around and take the poop home with me and put it back in the fridge (except for one sample that has to be FROZEN)  

As you can imagine we have many poop jokes going on at my house!


You know how some folks are hoarders?  Well I'm the opposite of a hoarder.  So even tho I had gone through our closets and things last summer for the Monier family yard sale, I went through it again today since I've pulled out all the winter clothes.  Sarah was wearing a size 2T last winter, now she wears a size 6 so there's stuff going to the consignment store. There are a few things she never wore, I had bought them for winter but we were gone so long, by the time we got home, she had grown too much.  Same with Selah, she outgrew things.  I've got two big full baskets to take to a friend's consignment store.  I'm looking forward to going.  I've tried doing the consignment store thingy before and always would forget to go back and get the money....I know that sounds stupid and we aren't talking about a ton of money but......    it was too complicated.   This store is like a franchise "Once Upon a Child" and is supposed to be really easy to use and work with.  I think it will be fun:)

Today was a very productive day:)  I love when I feel like I'm getting things done and organized.  With the kids and all the medical/school issues we have then just regular life things, like cleaning the house/yard and then add all the church respondsibiites, I get slightly overwhelmed at times.   And the "new" Yvonne just gives up when she is overwhelmed.  I still have about 40 irons in the fire but at least I got some things accomplished today. 

We are loving this cold weather!  Yesterday I bought a sweater dress since it wouldn't hit 70 today or tomorrow LOL!  I almost bought boots too, cause you never know if we might get snow!  LOL  Of course by Sunday we are supposed to be back to the 80's!    I have this love affair with winter clothes.  Sweater dresses are like Nirvana for me.  And I have a red wool Ann Taylor coat that I can wear probably 3x a year if I'm lucky that I love!  That coat I got at a thrift store years ago in Rochester NY and I adore it, as does everyone who sees it!  I can't tell you how many compliments I've got on it.  I guess since we don't have a lot of cold weather, we really like it when we have it! 

I've been in a "clothes mood" lately.  I guess changing our closets over to winter things (definition of "winter things" for Florida folks means LONG sleeved shirts, jeans instead of shorts, a few sweaters and hoodies.....but I'm particular about colors too- like the colors have to be fall/winter colors)  I've bought myself a few things and the kids some stuff too.  I buy a lot of things at thrift stores, if I can find really nice stuff.  If not, then it is SALES!  I bought Sam some long dress pants, I wasn't sure about the size, but went ahead and bought a size 5....oh my gosh, thank goodness the waist could be tightened, they are almost too big for him.  I have the inside belt clichéd at the tightest point and they are still loose on him and too long.  He is so little and cute!  Almost 10 years old and a size 5 is too big!  Next I need to go through the boys' stuff.  I let them put all their things away and I notice they begin wearing the same 2 or 3 outfits....so I know it's time to go through stuff and help them reorganize.  Steve is finally beginning to notice clothes LOL!  He even said he wanted to go shopping for clothes I could NOT believe that came out of his mouth!!!!!  One thing I've noticed is there is NO decent clothes for boys from about size 2T to adult in thrift stores, I think boys are too rough on their clothes!  And I refuse to buy worn looking things.  If you have the time, which I really don't and can go to several thrift stores, you can find nice things.  It's fun, you never know what you may find, like a red wool Ann Taylor coat!

Sarah has not said Mama again but likes to laugh as I say it over and over again.  I'm sure she will say it again for em but I'm thankful I got to hear it once! 

 Well today is day 13 of HBOT, we've seen no changes.  That makes me sad but what can I do?  We've done all we can, we are faithful to take her and we just have to leave the results in God's hands.  I've been really sad the last couple of days, going through clothes and shoes that Selah wore briefly made me sad.  I can't help but pray as I look through things for God to bring her back.  The girls were such different sizes when we first got home that they didn't wear the same things.  Today I put one little jean skirt in the pile to go to the consignment shop and almost cried.  I have a picture of Selah wearing it on our first family outing once we were home.  It was hard for me to part with it, even tho if she were healed, she'd never be able to fit back into it......   So even in the middle of life, my thoughts are never far away from Selah and my heart is always crying out for her to be healed.  Please continue to keep her in your prayers. 

MAMA

Last night after a long day, we were putting the little ones to bed.  I called Sarah over to me "Sarah come to Mama".  Usually she hops over but this time she just laid there.  I went over to pick her up and she looked right at me and said "MAMA"!!!!!  She sounded like one of those baby dolls that say Mama.  Jon and I just started laughing!!!! 

What an amazing privilege to hear her first word and that it was directed at me:)  I probably would have bawled if I hadn't been in such shock!

Sarah was totally non verbal when we got her.  She didn't make any noise.  Over time she began squealing and laughing.  Just in the past month or so she has been making the "M" sound.  There had been a few times she made a sound close to Ma but never Mama and never so clear. 

So today in the car she made a sound like "Steve"  we all were laughing and clapping then she clapped.  She hasn't said Mama again. 

I don't know this means she will start talking or have a few words.  It really doesn't matter to us.  If she does start doing some talking it would just be the icing on the cake!  She is almost 7 years old and typically children do not learn to talk this late.  She was totally non verbal in Ukraine, we never saw her make a sound there at all.  Sam only has a few words, one of them being NO that he says quite frequently and loudly:) 

But I was honored to be called Mama by my sweet daughter who caught my heart from the moment I first saw her picture.  There is so much behind that simple word........it took a miracle to bring us together, so I could be her Mama.  So thankful for the chance to care for her!


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Please keep praying for Selah- Day 12 of HBOT

Being Real

http://www.convoyofhope.org/    You can help! Text the word "CONVOY" to 50555 to make a $10 donation to Convoy of Hope and their relief efforts in the Philippines   Convoy of Hope is the Assemblies of God (our denomination) response to national disasters.  They are quite wonderful and are in place throughout the US and the world in order to reach out when disasters strike.  If you feel moved to give to the Philippines Disaster, I can assure you that the money given goes to the relief fund.   Our prayers are with the people of the Philippines! 

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You know if I could write blogs in the middle of the night from my bed, you'd have some interesting things to read!  I can compose great, interesting articles that would just rock your world....but I can't remember them when I wake up!  Ha ha!  Last night I was hoping a chunk of the falling satellite was not going to fall on us.  Having things falling out of the sky is very scary to me!  

Today has been a quiet day, HBOT for Selah.  PT for Selah and Sarah and OT for Sam and Sarah.....

We had a 3 hour look for one set of our keys, I found them in Shad's backpack (they had fallen down from the hook)  The SAME backpack that I asked if it had been looked in....only a few minutes into the hunt!

I got some paperwork sorted and filed, some with sticky on them "to do" tomorrow. 

Last night we watched "Killing Kennedy" it was a good movie, a few cuss words but hey we are talking about the Kennedy's.  It's sort of fascinating to us since Jon was born just days after JFK's assassination.  I find history from the early 1900's- the 80's interesting.  I really like World War II history and also the Cuban Missile Crises is very interesting to me.   My aunt would tell me stories having lived through all of that.  She was violently anti-Catholic and hated Kennedy although she was a Democrat LOL.  That must have been hard for her!

So after we watched KK, there wasn't much on and we watched a particular minister on TV.  This guy used to be a "big name" preacher but now he is such a "has been"  We watched as a grandson "preached".  It was very theatrical and very "us-them" with THEM" being everyone else in the world, particularly the church world.....  so sad to see such a failure.  I watch the crazy snake handlers out of curiosity.   I watched this dude the same way.  Oh they had some truth mixed in with the craziness....but just a little truth.

One thing I don't understand is HOW people get sucked into supporting and being a part of something so screwy?  When I was in my early 20's I went with a good guy friend to see this same preacher at the USF Sundome.  We were very excited to hear him in person....Until he started speaking.  Then something inside of me just rose up and I knew something was "OFF" with this guy.  Here I was 20 or 21 years old, and I knew something was not right.  Come to find out, he had a few hookers on the side along with all kinds of other things......   Now I didn't hear him preach anything wrong that night, but something inside of me just knew the guy wasn't right.  At the time, I felt a bit guilty for feeling that way.  Even when he fell and made national headlines, I could not believe it was true....but it was!

 A few years later Jon and I happened to be in the same town, for a funeral.  We had some time so we went over to the "ministry headquarters" out of sheer curiosity....  There was a security guard and he invited us into their mid week service.  OH MY GOSH...during the service, I literally felt the hair on the back of my night rise up!   It was so creepy.  I was glad to get the heck out of there as soon as it was over. 

Last night as the camera panned the small audience, there were folks who were very touched, I'm sure some of them were very genuine.   But what I don't understand is WHY people who probably pray and read their bibles, don't have any discernment?   I sensed something was off over 25 years ago....it don't seem like it is any more "on" now LOL!   Do people just not have discernment?  Do they not have a backbone?  What is it that keeps people in unhealthy spiritual (or any type) of situation?   Do they have no confidence in themselves to go against the flow? 

As you can imagine, I don't have a problem "going against the flow".  But do you know where the hardest place to go against the flow is even for me?  In a church/religious setting.    When I was younger, I would feel something but didn't have the confidence to act on it.  OR if I did act on I got blown down.  I did an internship at a very very very dysfunctional ministry.  When I returned to college that fall, I spoke with my advisor about some of the issues and was told "Touch NOT God's anointed and do His prophets no harm."  I was told not to share anything with anyone that would make that ministry look negative or I would be in trouble.  I was BEYOND shocked at my advisor who I really loved and appreciated.  He had never spoke to anyone like he did to me.  And I had not shared anything with anyone up till that point as I was devastated  by the things I had seen/heard.   Should I go on to mention that that particular minster and ministry  was  dealt with and exposed within 5 years without any participation of myself.  Everything I shared with my advisor was put out in the open and many knew about it.   But it also crushed the ones who had to bring out truth. 

I learned by that experience, boy did I.  One thing I learned is to never ever think anyone is above reproach.  I am all about showing honor to ministers.  My husband is a minister and I wouldn't want someone to say bad things that were untrue about him.  But guess what????    He lives his life in an upright fashion, if someone said something about him, everyone would know that person was telling a lie.  Over the years, he has had folks here and there that didn't like him or some decision he made, but they could never point to him doing anything dishonest or immoral because he lives his life an open book.  Working as a chaplain, he is a chaplain to the WHOLE prison, each faith group, not just Christians.  He does things correctly so no one can say he shows preference to one group over another....oh they could say it but they'd have no proof.  Prisoners can file "grievances" if they feel they have been done wrong in any area of their prison life from their diet to their spiritual care.  Even in that, he keeps it clean, and does what his obligations are for each inmate so he doesn't have issues with that. 

As much as I believe in honoring ministers, I also do not believe in hiding the truth if someone is in sin or if a ministry becomes dysfunctional.  Everyone is human and everyone makes mistakes, everyone sins.....even the best of ministers.  But there comes a point, where things can not be tolerated. 

In this particular case that I was watching on tv, I was just sicken by some of the things that came out of this guy's mouth.  Some of it was biblical truth but it was so warped and delivered in so much anger, I can't imagine anyone wanting to watch it except out of sheer curiosity ( I also have more than my share of that too LOL)  .   

I've tried to be open to ministers.  We had a so called revival in our area a few years ago.  We took Sam as our friends told us that people were being prayed for and healed.  When we got there, there was a great spirit and wonderful worship.  All the people on the platform were dressed very casually so I didn't know who anyone was.  There was really no preaching that night, some folks were prayed for.  I wasn't really sure of the whole thing but the revival kept going on, some people didn't like the preacher because he had tattoos.   I would NEVER have a Tat cuz I hate pain!  But I can understand loving my kids enough to tattoo their names on my shoulder or something so I'm not anti Tats although I think in a few years there are going to be some ugly old folks with sagging tattoos LOL.    Anyway the "revival services" moved from the large church to a Civic Center and we went again.  This time we took a man in our church who had terminal cancer.  He was interested.  That night, there was none of the sweet spirit of worship as we saw on the first night.  In fact, I felt uncomfortable, as did my husband.  We decided not to go back again.  Soon we find out that the minister was involved with someone in his ministry team.  I can't say we were unduly surprised. 

What was surprising is all the support the man got from the charismatic community.  He was not repentant at all.  I'm not saying to kick a man when he is down but hey if you are leaving your wife and several children for a younger woman, it might just be time for you to take a time out from ministry! 

Some people might wonder why I even write about stuff like this on my blog.  Why am I not all "sunshine and roses" and loving Jesus......    I do love Jesus but sometimes there is an elephant in the room that no one addresses.  To me it looks foolish not to be real to a watching world.  I didn't start this blog because of Selah's accident or our adoptions, that is not the focus of my blog.  Nor is that WHO I am.   These are thing I wrestle with and think about.  I take my Christianity very serious whether it involves helping orphans, or preaching true clean doctrine.....  I am about being real in all parts of my life.   I'm not perfect and never have been but I think about things, deeply.

Anyhow that was some of my thoughts last night.....wonder what tonight will bring??



Please keep praying for Selah.  No changes....YET!