Day 50 fish oil study Christmas Eve 2012

Selah had a great day!  No storming, arms relaxed, attentive in therapy...thank God!  She seems to be recovering.  We still don't know for sure what it was.  She was taken off the new meds but honestly she had regressed long before she went on that medicine.  She got a new bottle of fish oil at the same time.  I still think it was the fish oil, that it had been compromised.  So the hospital will probably say it was the new med, I say it was the fish oil but either way, she is better.  We are praying that she recovers to the point she was before she was transferred down here.  She still had quite a way to go until she gets to that point but at least there has been no further regression!


We went to the candlelight service, it was lovely! I love the liturgical services in the Methodist church.  There is just something comforting about it to me.  Jon was raised Methodist so he is used to it.  I was raised Pentecostal, old time Pentecostal, so I had never been in a "high church" service until after we got married.  It was interesting to me and unusual since I had never been to a church like that.  Over the years, I have come to really appreciate the liturgical services and the meaningful steps in them.  I also like the "no surprises" part of church LOL, I admit it, I love having the whole service in the bulletin, you can guess how long you got left in the service LOL.  You might not appreciate that unless you've been in services that have lasted for days....Just kidding, just hours....

We picked up our supper at Publix again and came home and ate then everyone opened a present.  We started with Sarah since this is her first Christmas!

it is a seat on wheels. Jon called it a "handicapped skate board" and she LOVES it!  she totally understood what to do with it:)  She was so happy it was hard to get a picture of her still:)  she certainly loved her first present!

 

Happy Shad

 

he loves nerf guns:)  he looks like a happy NRA president:)

 

 

Sam remembered what to do

 

Steve has some new jeans

 

Jon got a gift card

 

I had opened my big present at home, it's a machine that has 3 crock pots in it!  I can't wait to use it!!  But it is rather big.  We also left Selah's things at home but I know she got a bean bag chair that will work perfectly for her to sit in!

 

We feel blessed.  Hope you all have a wonderful Christmas!

 

Sarah's Christmas Eve somersault!!!!

 

Look at this little gymnastic!  she might even be into yoga:)   this little girl could hardly lift her head when we met her in April!  Once she gets into therapy, who knows what she will do????     BTW her shirt says "Love makes me smile"  it sure does because she is always smiling!  We love her so much!!!!  I didn't get to write a Happy Birthday post for her, her bday was on the 21st.  But I have to say I have loved her with all my heart since the day I saw her picture...even in a mental institution, she had a smile on her face.  Sarah was so meant to be my daughter that God worked every little thing, just so,  I saw her picture and couldn't forget her....talk about a series of fortunate events. 

 

I can not imagine my life, our life without her!  She is a JOY to have in our family.  When Sarah was born, her parents would not touch her because she was missing an eye and they immediately signed her over to the state.  That makes me so angry!  She went through hell for years.  I wish I would have seen her picture sooner, I whisper that in her ears and she just smiles and giggles at me.  I tell her the stork accidentally took her to the wrong country & that she was mine from the moment she was born.   She may not understand the words but she knows she has a family that adores her now.....  I can tell how secure she is with us.  Sarah never had one issue with us in adapting to our family.  She & Selah both fit perfectly.  Not every adoption is that smooth but I think they were just ready for us!  We certainly were ready for them!

 

 

this is the first picture we saw of her.....

it kept me up all night, she looked just like Sam but she was alone in an adult mental institution....

 

So Sarah it might be a few days late but I love and adore you from head to little toes!  Happy Birthday, you'll never be alone again:)

 

Fox News Report Sunday morning at Grace Church

http://www.myfoxtampabay.com/video?clipId=8098924&autoStart=true

here's the link for Fox news report from our church on sunday morning.  I love seeing all our folks:) 

Christmas Eve thoughts

This Christmas will be one we will never forget.  Not only is it the first Christmas we've spent away from home, it is the first Christmas with our two girls.  Oh the plans I had for this Christmas....I wanted to make it so meaningful for our family....  I'm not a decorator, for the past 5 years we haven't had a Christmas tree because we were afraid Sam would pull it down on his head!  But this year I was going to get out all our ornaments and put them on the tree. I was going to put it up in our church where it would be safe from the three little ones and the three little ones would be safe from it!   We have some special ornaments, I buy them but never put them up LOL.  I'm one of those people, even when we put up the tree was so glad for it to come down and our house "get back to normal"  I don't like clutter or extra things out.  don't I sound like Scrooge?  But I do love Christmas, a simple Christmas. 

We don't try to out do ourselves each year but we do look forward to finding a few meaningful things ( things the kids really want and would use for more than 5 minutes)  for each child.  It's fun to that do that for them.  We work on trying to keep our kids from getting too materialistic..  This year a group from Bell Shoals Baptist that volunteer at the prison where my husband is chaplain blessed our family.  Back in November I got an email asking what the kids wanted for Christmas....we were just floored !!!  It was really hard for me to even think about what they wanted.  We took Shad through Toys R Us and wrote down some things he liked (he was by far the easiest!  By that I mean he can do a wish list hahahaha!)  Steve honestly was at a loss and the little ones are really hard to find things that they will actually play with/use.  But we managed to come up with a list. They came by Saturday night and dropped off the presents to us, wrapped Thank God!!!!.  I am so thankful for them.  Not only are our fiances tight but my mind is almost gone and the thought of doing real Christmas shopping makes me feel like having a panic attack.  We did find "something" at the Christian bookstore for Steve and Shad.  And I did do a Build A Bear for Sam (with voice activation) but that was the extent of it for us, that did me in!  If I had a million dollars to spend right now, I couldn't do it.  So I am so thankful for the sweet folks at Bell Shoals Baptist who blessed our family and who bless the inmates throughout the year with their presence and love.  Jon is thankful for the great group of volunteers who work tirelessly at ZCI to bring God's love to "his" inmates:)  There is no doubt in my mind that Jon has the best job for him in the world!  He loves being a chaplain and loves the men he serves!!!  And he is helped by all the 100 plus volunteers that come in and give additional service to the inmates. 

We were also blessed by a sweet young family here in this area with a gift card for the kids.  They have just suffered a loss in their family this past year and have tender hearts.  Thank you all too. 

So this is a different kind of Christmas for us....we have seen God's provision throughout this past year on a scale that we have never seen before.  Of course we have never needed it like we have this past year!  We've seen God's gift of His faithfulness on a scale we have never seen before....remembering our simple Christmas last year...waiting on our new children, hearts filled with anticipation....  Last year we had a Christmas Dinner and had our family and some of our closest friends over and we just had a good time together hanging out all day and laughing....  in my heart I was worried about our little ones in Ukraine and they were never far from my mind but we almost had all our paperwork done to bring them home by that point.  We got our USCIS (clearance form the US government- our last document) between Christmas and New Years (thanks to Mario Rubio's office!)

So tonight we are going to Mandarin United Methodist Church to their candle light Christmas Eve service.  Another church that has just blessed our family and wrapped their arms around us!  Then we'll come back to our "home away from home" and let the kids unwrap a present ( our tradition).  It may be different but when our kids are older, they will be reminded of God' love, faithfulness and provision to us during this time.  That is a real "life" lesson! 

I hope all of you have a wonderful Christmas this year and that you realize what Christmas is all about....  the Prince of Peace came into this world that night....He is still the Prince of Peace no matter what is going on in this world or in our own lives.....

ABCnews report from our church today

http://www.abcactionnews.com//dpp/news/region_pasco/zephyrhills/near-fatal-stroller-accident-left-one-child-fighting-for-life?fb_action_ids=10200144210117192&fb_action_types=og.recommends&fb_source=other_multiline&action_object_map=%7B%2210200144210117192%22%3A512368308803193%7D&action_type_map=%7B%2210200144210117192%22%3A%22og.recommends%22%7D&action_ref_map=[]

HEre's the link for the news today.  They came and taped our service.  Very Sweet. 
Our church is called Grace Church not Grace Connection but that's ok:)

Day 49 fish Oil Study~ better news

Selah did NOT storm today!  Two changes were made.  Yesterday she was taken off the new drug called Amantadine, AND the they opened a new bottle of fish oil.  So I don't know which helped but one did and today has been stable.  thank God!!

We went home yesterday.  I was really afriaid of my emotions going in and seeing Selah's crib and her princess car.  It did hurt but I was able to deal with it better than I thought.  Maybe because I was overwhelmed with all I have to do in order to get her home and to have our house ready.

We had a great service this morning and were glad to see our friends and family!  I had to fight my emotions a few times.  I can't help but remember the last time we were in service and I had two little girls with me. I do not like to cry in front of people and I "ugly cry"  so I was really not wanting to lose it!!   We left Zephryhills around 5 pm, it was hard to leave our family and some close friends and got back to Jax at 9 pm.  We drove up a back way through the Ocala National Forest and saw 2 deer and a wolf! 

I'm trying to figure out HOW I am going to get everything done in our home before Selah comes home.  The boys are giving up their room for her and we are moving all their things out to a cornor of the fellowship hall.  They will share the room with Sam & Sarah for now until we make a decision about what we are going to do.  Obviously we either have to add on or move.  since we live in a parsonage, it is not the smartest idea to put alot of money into remodeling it just for Selah because one day we will move and then we wouldn't be able to take it with us.  We haven't heard from Extreme Home Makeover yet...we keep hoping we will be contacted by them.  We live in a pretty small house if you add a full time nurse to the mix!  I'm a public person in some ways (I guess that is obvious since I blog) but I'm also very private when it comes to my real emotions and my family. 
We will make this work for Selah but it's going to be uncomfortable for all of us.

We are going to have to go home before this weekend in order to do alot of this and do a deep cleaning ( carpets/curtains etc) things I have to have done before she comes home (because I know it won't get done once she is home! Our other van wouldn't crank today nor would the ignition switch turn, so that has to be taken care of too.  I have a list of things to do...  a list helps me  but I am overwhelmed feeling right now!!! 

Please keep praying for Selah!  Pray that she begins responding like she used and progresses again!!!!

Day 48 Fish OIl study

We are home.  Trying to put away 4 months of stuff....feeling overwhelmed.

Selah had storms all day.  Jon stayed till about noon, then he came back so we could get started on our trip, it's about a 4 hour drive.  We are just heartsick and worried tonight.  We brought a child to Florida who was recovering and full of promise.  Yes she had a long way to go, but she had only gone forward even when she had pneumonia.  Now in less than 2 weeks our child is back to where she was over 2 months ago!  I'm mad and worried.  In my heart I feel it's something to do with the fish oil.  She does not smell fishy at all.  To me that makes me think the fish oil was compromised. All we know is the hospital in NY treated it like it was gold.  Here I've seen it out and on the nurse's cart as rounds were made....  Of course I checked with the doctor's assistant who does the study and he said the fish oil should tolerate that but I can not get away from the fact she does not smell brimy anymore and she is storming....  to me it goes together...

The nurse felt like her first storm this morning was a direct result of the new med she started so those meds have been discontinued.  But she has had issues all day....even if she wasn't storming, her heart rate was much higher than normal and they gave her extra meds. 

PLEASE pray for Selah!!!!!!  We are so scared for her.  Something is terribly wrong and I do NOT believe it is just Selah being "unstable"  she was stable for far too long!!

We are here trying to figure out how to put stuff away and organize the house for Selah.  Jon is going to do the service at the prison and the church tomorrow then we are going back.  I will have to come home and stay for a couple of days to get ready for Selah to come home on Jan 2.  I feel like i have so much to do...

Please please pray for Selah tonight and tomorrow at your church service!  We need help and wisdom.  We don't think we can get things together until Jan 2 to get her home and we'd rather her be stable before we tried to get her home.  I do not know what we are going to do!!!