Thursday, December 13, 2012

Day 39 fish OIl (and day 1 for Sarah!) We're in Jax!

So we finally made it here!  We began wondering if Florida had moved or something, it seemed like such a long drive. 

We went straight to see Selah.  She has had her Aunt Val with her to take care of her and she was relaxed when we got there.  Funny thing is we could smell her down the hall....39 days of fish oil has quite the brimy smell:)  Our sweet little Mermaid:)

She seemed to have a lot of guck coming out of the trache, it was actually bubbling out!  The color was greenish and it worried me.  Evidently she has had that since she got there and everyone thought it was her "normal".  As soon as I said she had never had anything like that, even when she was sick a couple of weeks ago, things started moving.  The respitor therapist came and did an xray and a culture of it.  Also right after we got there, her oxygen level dropped to the low 90's which really scared me.  Never has she had that happen!  So she was put on a little supplemental oxygen for tonight just to make it easy on her.  (just got an update from Val and her chest xray was clear, still waiting for the culture to come back)

The Rehab is beautiful and her room is huge!  It actually looks like a spa:)  the staff was very responsive to us and it's been like that for Valerie too.  We will meet all the doctors and therapists tomorrow and have some meetings.  We are looking forward to it!

We met our new friend in the parking lot of the hospital and he gave us the directions to our hotel and the keys along with some goodies!  When we got to the hotel.....we were FLOORED!!  Two bedrooms and a bath, living room and kitchen area!  The whole place was decorated for Christmas, including a live tree!!!  The cupboards were filled with our favorite goodies and so was the fridge!  Thank you so much Mandarin United Methodist!  We are so grateful to your kindnesses to us!!!!!   After we unpacked (what a job-it seemed like my brain was mush!)  we ate and it was just so nice not to have to run anywhere to get something to eat!  What a blessing to our family.  The boys were just amazed that someone would do something like this for us!  They were jumping around with happiness at every new discovery:)  It was cute, everyone was tired but that woke us all up for awhile:)

So we are all about to fall out, Jon is really sick, he actually took some medicine so you know he is sick!  Steve feels better, both little ones have runny noses/coughing...me and Shad are still ok! We 're going to get up tomorrow and start this new phase of Selah's recovery.  Please pray for her that she will respond more and more each day! 

BTW, Dr Sears sent us some fish oil for us to use including liquid fish oil for the little ones.  Since we have a fridge, we opened it tonight and gave some to Sarah in applesauce.  She took it and didn't seem to mind it!  I'm curious to see what affect it has on her.  She is so very delayed, much like a 3 or 4 month old....  Now if we can just trick Sam. but that might be harder to do!   Also today I thought we should try and get Sarah into the out patient therapy here.  I feel like we "wasted" the last 4 months for her.  If we would have known how long we were going to be in NY, we would have gotten Sarah into therapy there.  She doesn't walk and her feet/legs turn in.  I had taken her for PT, OT, and speech evaluations before we left for NY and I had everything ready for all of them to start therapy when we got home....  since she spent all her time "bed ridden" tied to a bed, she could only lift her head a little and roll when we got to her.  Now she pulls herself up and stands by the couch, or in the crib....but she has no idea of how to walk, she puts one foot on top of the other.  So maybe we can get her started soon here and work with her also.  I called our doctor and they have already sent all the paperwork needed for her to get started!  Hopefully we can get a date tomorrow for Sarah to get started in therapy.

Wednesday, December 12, 2012

Day 38 Fish Oil Study~ I feel like traveling on......

Selah had all our evaluations today.  I don't know that she did as well as normal as she seems stressed out but I think that is good, as it may keep her goals more manageable and that is important as she has to meet goals to stay in rehab.  Her aunt is taking care of her and reminding them all of who Selah is!  I'm so thankful that Valerie is with her, I'd be a mess if she were there by herself!

We will be there by early afternoon and be there for some of her therapies and we will get to meet her new doctors and therapists and see what they have to say.  We are excited/anxious to know what they say....  We've stopped north of Charlotte NC and are staying at a great hotel thanks to our friends, calling us and surprising us with a reservation:) 

On our way up to Rochester, we stopped in Mt Ariy NC, Andy Griffin's  hometown and had a fun day.  We took some really cute pictures of the kids that day, it was a good time.  Driving past that exit tonight, just broke my heart.  I started bawling, remembering that day.  All I could think is "if only I could turn back time"  Oh God, if we had only known what was before us..... 

Don't get me wrong, I'm thankful for how far Selah has come, but she has so far to go to be where she was...will that happen?  We just don't know.  Today I have had to remind myself again..."do not fear"   Long road trips give you a lot of time to think....the future is scary...so many unknowns

Please pray for Selah....pray that she comes all the way back to us!

 
the kids in the Mayberry Jail  (Selah in orange, Sam, Shad and Steve holding Sarah)

 
Sam in bed!  He didn't want to get up this morning

 
Sam on the trip listening to the bear reading "twas the night before Christmas"  for hundreds of miles!!!!

Tuesday, December 11, 2012

The Clanton Family Heads Back To Florida

The Clanton Family Heads Back To Florida

You can watch a news show done today

Day 37 fish Oil Study...on the way to Florida

This was a very emotional day for us, a day of good-byes to some wonderful people who have walked with us through our darkest days.....

We started the morning saying goodbye to Selah's therapist, Megan.  She was such an encouragement to us and helped us to understand Selah better.

Then we said good bye to some of our RMH families, some more staff, our doctor, social workers and a minister friend and his family....

We waited for the transport team to get there and once they were there, things moved fast!  I literally had to fight a panic attack when they first walked in.  It was hard for me to entrust her to some one's care to go all the way to Florida on a small plane!  The team put us at ease immediately and we could tell they really cared about their patients.  We walked down with her and that was so emotional for me, I just sobbed the whole way.  We happened to go down in the same elevator she was taken up to the PICU on , almost 18 weeks ago.  Then we went out the ambulance bay where I had stood waiting to go in to the ER on the awful day (actually where I tried to climb over a cop to get into the ER, if we are to be factual!!  LOL)  It was snowing...and I couldn't help but contrast the days....   We went back up and so many folks were coming up to us to wish us well, it was hard to control my emotions!


 
 
 
 
 
 
 

 
Then we went over to the RMH and did a news conference with all the news stations of the Rochester area.  It still surprises me how much interest and concern the Rochester community has shown to Selah and to us! 
 
We had so much stuff that the RMH offered to ship some for us but our van is packed to the gills:)  We only made it to Lewisburg Penn tonight as we are just exhausted and a bit overwhelmed.  We hope to do really good tomorrow and maybe even make it to Jax....well we can hope can't we LOL! 
 
The transport team was awesome and kept us up to date as to where they were.  Selah had absolutely no issues on the trip and even slept some:)  She touched down about 6:30 pm and is now resting comfortably at the rehab with her Aunt Valerie by her side!  Thank God for Valerie being able to take off work and come up and stay with her until we can get there.  It gives us a great peace of mind knowing she has someone who loves her with her! 
 
 
Thank you all for your prayers and please continue to pray for us that we have safe travels the rest of the 880 miles (according to my son) until we get to Jax.  Tomorrow will be a big day for Selah as she will be evaluated by various therapist, please pray that they will understand who Selah was and is and that God will give them a special love for this little girl and that they will want to fight with us to bring her all the way back!  My sister in law is impressed with the rehab and feels good about it so far and that has helped me too.  They seem to be understanding about Selah and all her complex issues she had even before the accident.  Pray that that will continue. 
 
And I just have to say thank you one more time to Strong's hospital and staff, we will be forever grateful for the wonderful care that our daughter was given.  What a great hospital and it is great because it is staffed with great people!!!
 
Thank you to the Ronald McDonald House, that truly was our "home away from home"  We grew to love the staff, Carol, the director, Lori, Patty, Kathy, Cher, Bonnie, Gail, Jack Amy, Deb, and all the volunteers....we had so many kindnesses shown to us.....  There are just not words to say how much they all mean to us!  If you live in the Rochester area, get involved with the RMH, it is a wonderful help to so many families!  They truly live their mission statement!  Volunteer, donate, promote, what ever you can do to help them!  They work with so many families and give them HOPE! 
 
Thank you ROCHESTER NY  for all the love and concern you all showed to our family.  Rochester is an amazing community!!
 
And always we will never forget the ones who helped rescue  our children.....
 
We are so grateful....
 

Monday, December 10, 2012

Day 36 Fish Oil Study

Jon couldn't sleep so he got up and got over to the hospital at 7 am this morning.  He put Selah's "talking nose" on and she wore it for 5 hours with no issues!  She had PT, OT and ST with the nose on and they worked her out!  She has been very aware today and did great in therapy.  We are so proud of her hard work!

Our poor social worker is getting all the details done for her transfer tomorrow, lots of details.    It looks like she will-be leaving between 11 am - 1 pm.  An Air Ambulance is coming in for her, with a nurse and a respiratory therapist on board.  It is going to be a very small 2 engine plane....please pray for her flight!  I am a nervous flyer and am certainly nervous about my child flying.....

We will wait to leave until she leaves....we want to make sure that is actually on her way before we leave.

She has collected quite a few stuffed animals and I just found out she can only have one small bag to go with her!  We were hoping that we could send most of her things with her but it doesn't look like that will happen!  So we are packing up her room.  We are going to look like the Beverly Hillbilly's leaving for Florida! 

Please keep her and us in your prayers tomorrow.  Thank you so much!

Sunday, December 9, 2012

Day 35 Fish Oil Study

Jon stayed with Selah while I cleaned and repacked everything.  she had a fantastic day!  He worked with her with her new "nose" and she did terrific, he was able to keep it on for 25 minutes each time.  The nurse thought he could just leave it on while he was in the room but he went by what the speech therapist had said, so it wouldn't wear her out since it takes much more effort.  She seemed "more awake" today.  Jon thought it might be because of the smaller dosage of Valium as well as having to be more aware of her breathing.  He said she was moving her head at every sound and trying to figure out what was going on.  He also had her up in her chair for about 2 hours and worked with her on the side of the bed, sitting and holding her head up.  He worked her today!  Her arms stayed relaxed so that is a relief!

Tonight we went to the Genesee Country Village and had a Christmas tour of the village thanks to some friends!  It was interesting, especially the church.  The tour told the story of Christmas back in the 1840s...very interesting but very cold and rainy!  Made me thankful for the modern conveniences such as lights and heat!  LOL  When we got back to the main hall, Steve was afraid I was going to catch my butt on fire I was standing so close to the fireplace!  It took me an hour to warm up!

Tomorrow we get all our info about the transfer and say alot of good byes.....we are going to miss so many people.....   It stills seems unbelievable that we are actually leaving....  We thought we were so many different times but we were never ready before to leave.  Looking back it is obvious why we were supposed to stay, Selah couldn't have been in the Fish Oil Study if we had left and gone home.  We never wanted to leave and I think some staff thought that was odd but we just didn't have a peace, there was too much "up in the air" about Selah and we had no assurance that anywhere we could go, could do as much for her as they could here at Strongs!  Of course nothing worked out for us to leave and while it was frustrating not to have hospitals to work with us, we also were always a bit relieved when things didn't work out!  Our poor social worker here should get merit pay for all the work he has put into this transfer!  We are so thankful she is at a place neurologically that she is eligible for a rehab facility and not a hospital! 

Sorry this is short but we are having internet issues.....

So again I ask for prayer for this transfer and prayer for safety....and peace.... and no snow on Tuesday!!!!

Saturday, December 8, 2012

Day 34 Fish Oil Study

Selah is doing good today, no problems.  We did some running around this morning then Jon came over this afternoon.  I came over after supper and as soon as I came in, she woke up & was very aware.  The weekends are slower paced, no therapy except what we do with her.  Her arms were normal when I came in, that was the first thing I checked.  So it doesn't seem like she is having an issues due to a reduction in the Valium.

Today we went and looked at the accident site again.  It just still seems unbelievable this happened....where Jon stopped the stroller, the road looks flat, and then further on the path begins a slight upward hill.  If anything it seems the stroller would have rolled backwards down the path, away from the water.  There is an overpass that I discovered right down from the site, so we looked at it from above and was able to see the tiny tree that Jon hung on to...Someone said to me the accident took 4 seconds to happen, I don't remember who told me that, but I have never forgotten that number, 4 seconds....and your life can change forever! 

We have the van half packed....it seems unreal that we really might be leaving here.  Friday was 18 weeks since we left home....next Saturday will be 4 months since the accident...  We've been here longer than we were home with the girls!  That makes me sad if I dwell on it, I want my sweet life back....I'm tired of all this medical stuff, I just want it all to go away and for us to be home, with no problems.  I want to be getting ready for their first Christmas....playing outside, doing things together with all 7 of us ....  I already had the girls matching Christmas dresses and we had planned where we were going for our first family Christmas picture....none of this was in my plans!  

I'm in a weird frame of mind, not feeling real spiritual, feeling pretty down, worried about the transfer and all the logistics that will go along with it.  Not looking forward to her being flown and us driving and it taking 2 days to get to her.  I'm a Mama that wants her chicks around her!  I will be honest I have trust issues....(yes say all my friends and family)  For me to send my daughter off to strangers is very hard for me.  Thankfully my sis in law will meet her and stay with her until we can get there (thank you Val!!!!!)  

Since Sam was born and I had to fight  the NICU doctor (who btw no longer has a license to practice medicine...scary!!)  I've been suspicious of doctors and nurses I don't know...  I've seen too much since having Sam so this is like my worst nightmare for my child to be in a hospital without me.  In my opinion & experience , Florida health care for children is not the greatest and we 've seen quite a bit of it and in various hospitals....  we are spoiled here!  Strong's Hospital here in Rochester is amazing, just for the fact we've been here so long and I've not had to yell at anyone!!   I usually never made it through an emergency room without having to get crazy with someone LOL   I never tell anyone I'm a pastor's wife if they don't already know LOL.....  So my experiences have made me very defensive, maybe I'll be proven wrong, I hope so!   But what I am expecting is to have to fight to get her days in rehab and then more fighting to get her the services she needs at home.  Here it's not been like that, it's been a team effort.  We noticed the difference when we brought Sam here for his eyes compared to the eye hospital we took him to in Miami.  The one in Miami is supposed to be the top one overall for eye care and patient satisfaction in the US!  Well they never asked us!   What a wonderful difference when we came here 5 years ago, it was refreshing, so different!   Now this experience has shown us even more how wonderful the health care is here.  I know some may suggest for us to move here, and we had thought about it when Sam first got his eye implants but we have too many ties in Florida, our church, Jon's job, too much change for our family unless we knew that was where God wanted us.  But I know I will always compare other health care to this and try to "encourage" other health care providers to bring themselves up to par!  And by "encourage" I mean they won't know I'm a pastor's wife....hahahahaha!  I do want to say I've found some great doctors in Florida , our pediatrician is perfect, very balanced and caring and his staff is great, so helpful always to our family.  I wouldnt' trade them for anything and we have a great neurologist too but I've found most specialists and hospitals not to be quite so good in Florida. 

I guess knowing some of what lies ahead for us, makes me more apprehensive about the future.  When Sam was born I just thought I had got a "bad apple " to work with in the NICU who was rude and patronizing to me, refusing to listen to me until I went "Madea" on him (for all the Madea fans out there you know what i mean!)  And even after knowing he was dead wrong about my child's eyes, he still fought me on every point until I was able to get Sam out of the hospital.  I thought then things would get better ....oh foolish me.... I have fought for every single thing and every single medical procedure....   It's true I'm older & wiser now and "I've been there , done that" and know what to do but it is no fun.   My years of working for the Department has done me well, I can focus and not get too emotional and I do get the job done but you just get tired of the fight.  With Sam medically, he is at a different point in his life, he hasn't been in the hospital for years except for the accident and I was ok with the services he was getting and knew it wouldn't be that much harder to get the girls the same services and see the specialists they needed but now....it's a new ball game....

Anyhow let me shut up and quit whining....sorry I don't do it much but I needed to write about how I'm feeling and that is just how I'm feeling right now!

We are not looking forward to saying goodbye to folks who have become close friends to us during this time and folks who take care of our girl, like she was their own child.  Monday will be a rough day for us.  I've told Jon he can't get too emotional, as he is quite emotional, where I try and push in all in....but we will both be a mess.  Thankfully we will still be coming up here for Sam's eye check ups yearly and will be up in the summer.  We believe that Selah will be able to come with us and have her evaluation at the year mark for the study she was originally in, the cooling sheets.  So at least I can repeat that over and over that we will see them soon.....

So pray for us, pray everything goes smoothly.  I'm a bit anxious about the whole long trip thing, and my imagination can run a bit wild with worry.... as much as I worry about the road trip, I worry about Selah being flown there....pray that God will protect all of us.   Pray that Selah will have an amazing improvement by Monday.  I'd love to leave here with on a really high note, for ourselves and for the staff who have worked so hard with Selah!  Because of all the circumstances, we have been here far longer than most would in our situation and we've had folks who have just put so much into Selah!  Dr Asslin, our OT Megan, our ST Meredith, several of the nurses, Kate, Noor, Lindsey,  along with others.....  it will be hard to say goodbye!