Survivor

It's been a year and today I feel like a survivor.... 

We have just made it through the worst year of our life but we are still standing.  Our family is intact, we've figured out how to live this "new normal"  Jon and I are still together, so many families divorce when tragedy strikes.....  Our kids are all close, no one is having any issues that we see.  We have made it by God's grace.

I want to talk about the faithfulness of God to us.  I may never understand WHY all this happened to us but God was faithful from the beginning to now.  He forewarned me through a word by a stranger in a Mall (LOL  I still can't help but laugh that the only "word" I've ever gotten has been in a Mall and not in some holy service LOL)  He was with me from the second I took off running down the road towards the rescue vehicles....  He was with Jon and gave him superhuman strength to get the kids off the bottom of the canal.  He had rescuers in place in the park. If no one had come to Jon, both of my children would have died, they were without a pulse and Jon had no way of doing CPR while clinging to a stroller and a branch....

While we were in NY so many wonderful people came across our path to encourage us.  We never lacked for anything.  The very day that Jon's leave time ran out, a couple brought us coats and an envelope full of "coffee money"  Let's just say that "coffee money" totaled more than Jon's bi weekly salary....  People were beyond gracious to us.  We specifically asked the various news organizations NOT to mention any need at that time.  In spite of that so many people who didn't know us were so generous to us.  I kept a list to send thank you  to but lost it and I'm very sorry but we are all so thankful for all that was done for us.  We got packages, gift cards, cards, cds....we were so blessed....  Ronald McDonald House of Rochester was AMAZING to our family and just wrapped their arms around us and loved on us daily!   All of the folks who blessed our family, were sent from God to put their human arms around us......Community Christian Church of Williamston NY rallied around us as did the pastor of Gates Assembly of God, some people came and went but those pastors were so faithful to us.  Our dear friends Dan & Charlene were always there for us too.

Then when we were going to the rehab in Jax, the Jacksonville Ronald McD House was not as friendly and told us that our family was too large for us to stay there.  We called once and was told NO in no uncertain terms....We had no idea where we'd stay....but then a dear college friend Bryan who is going through his own valley with numerous medical issues, contacted some friends who just blessed us....   Mandarin  United Methodist church  just wrapped their arms around us and loved on our family.  They gave points and money so we could stay at a very nice long term hotel.  they arranged meals for us and just really reached out to our family those 8 weeks we were in Jax.   Again God in human flesh helping our family.....

God was faithful to us as were his people.  We were never alone, never overcome by worry about financial matters.  In fact we didn't really even think about things like that because we were so involved with Selah's situations.  God had His people there so we didn't have to think or worry about anything.  Thank you all so much. 

God was faithful to us during this past year in a way I've never known.  He has given me courage to face one of the worst situations of having a child who is still in a light coma or a persistent vegative status.  God doesn't' always remove every problem from our path, He is not a genie.   But God is still a good God.  He will be with you when tragedy strikes.  We live in a fallen world, bad things happen....but God can walk with you through the bad times. 

I'm the wife of a pastor, we have had our own personal tragedies to deal with and we have seen many other people's tragedies.  Life is not fair or easy....NO ONE gets out alive....

So many people still expect life to be easy and perfect for them.  I just love when someone who doesn't give God the time of day is so quick to turn around and blame God when their 90 year old grandmother dies....   "Oh why didn't God heal my grandmother???  Why???" 
Believe it or not I've seen that happen.....  And honestly had to bite my tongue.   So you don't care about God except for when your life is touch by tragedy and then you expect God to" make it all better?"  Now I'm not taking anyone's death lightly, my own mean grandma died at 91 years of age and I wept at her funeral.  It's just that, that was an extreme situation..... there comes a time when the laws of nature take over.....( I believe God put those laws into place)

But sometimes we as humans are quick to be like a 5 year old and get angry at God and go off in a huff with out toys  "I'm not playing with you God...I'm not serving you anymore God"  I know humans can be like that because that is basically what I did when we lost the twins.  But I learned that there was ONLY ONE place to run to in time of trouble and that was towards God not away from Him.   There are times when I am still tempted to do that, times I want to throw up my hands and quit serving God.   But I know, I know the faithfulness of God.  How can I walk away from One who has loved me and taken care of me?  How can I leave the One who was close by my side in a lonely hospital room?  Where would I go to?  

There is NO where in scripture that promises us a life free of trouble, in fact if you read the bible at all, you'll see the Bible actually promises us trouble will come our way.... BUT God will be with us through it all IF we let Him. 

Everyone wants a miracle and Lord knows I do too....but when we look in scripture at folks who were raised from the dead, we realize something....they are dead now....  Jesus didn't raise them up to live eternally on this earth.  You don't see Lazarus walking around....  Everyone that had any type of miracle done for them, they are all still dead now....Does that make sense to you?  What I'm saying is that even if your life is perfect and you have no hardships, there will still come a day when you breathe your last breath.  


So I just want to encourage you in whatever situation you are in , you can be a survivor IF you trust in God.  He can walk you through the darkest valley.  He can be there in the storm and we are learning, He will be with you as you walk a hot dry desert land....  Trust Him, don't get angry about the things in your life...

God is faithful and He is just....

I'm determined to trust Him.  There have been times when I've asked Him not to let me fail Him in a public way.  Our lives have been more public over the past year and I do not want to bring shame on the name of Jesus through my doubts and unbelief.  But I do want to remain open and honest. 

I can tell you today that God is still a good God.  I know He has been with us and enabled us to deal with this past year.  We can be survivors because of His faithfulness!