Day 32 Fish Oil Study

 

   

 

 

 

Today Selah got to meet her rescuers...again....   Lindsey, Bridgett and Sarah helped to rescue the children and we met them right after the accident.  At that point Selah was not doing good.  They were able to meet Sam but this is the first time they got to meet Selah.  We had a chance to talk about the accident.  There are so many missing pieces of that day for us.  Lindsey was the first one to the kids and Jon handed her Sam.  She told us today that he was blue and had no heart beat.  It's a bit overwhelming because the accident was Sam's 4th near death experience....  He was born prematurely & out doctor was not sure he'd survive birth.  He was so concerned that he didn't want me to have my tubes tied & told me that he just wasn't sure how things would go...   Then when Sam was three months old, he aspirated on meds and had no pulse when the EMS got to our home.  Then when he was five years old, he had a seizure lasting close to an hour due to hypoglycemia!  And then the drowning!   Makes me thank God for him daily.  Tonight when I was putting him to bed, I put my hand on his forehead & just thanked God he was alive, well and lying in his bed!!!!

 

Bridgett was also in the water & helped Jon with Selah.  They worked on trying to get her out of the stroller & kept her head out of the water & was able to do some rescue breathing on her.  Sarah was on top of the bank working on the kids with the Doctor who was there.  We thank God for these beautiful young ladies who are all in their first year of medical school.  May God bless them abundantly!!!

 

 

 

 

Selah also got serenaded by a very nice lady with her harp playing.  It was so beautiful!  Selah enjoyed it and so did we!

 

 

Our good friends Bill & Ilene came by to see us today.  We used to work together in NYC almost 20 years ago:)

 

Tonight was our Christmas party at the RMH.....as you can see Sam was not too thrilled with Santa!  Sarah was wanting to roll on the ground.....But it was fun:)

 

Selah had a good day, did great breathing with her trach being closed.  I believe she will be getting the "talking nose" tomorrow.  That is a "nose" or cover for her trach that will keep it covered so she can make noises.  Of course that means the whole time it is on, she has to be breathing through her mouth and nose. 

 

She also will be getting a sonogram to see if the old blood clot in her leg is gone.  Hopefully it is so she can stop having the shot in her belly 2x a day! 

 

We discussed with her doctor about lowering the dose of the Valium she gets.  She gets 4 small doses daily.  Starting tomorrow, she won't get her morning dose.  She was started on Valium when she was having "storming" now she doesn't thank God so we can start backing off the meds and see if she does ok:) 

 

We are so thankful for the progress we and others see in Selah!  It is a blessing!  We are so thankful for her life, and that we will be able to be her mommy & daddy for a long time we pray!

 

In the past month, two children died here that we knew their families...two other children who were part of our adoptive community, and one child that I grew up with her aunt and mom, and one who was a long term drowning victim......all six were really unexpected deaths...  it makes me think to number my days and to appreciate my family.  When it comes down to it, there is nothing on this earth more precious than your family.  We are not promised tomorrow with them.  I know my prayer for a long time has been for God to protect us and keep us all together for as long as possible....not the most deep or spiritual prayer but it is from my heart.  I love my husband and these five wonderful children with every fiber of my being....  There is nothing that means more to me than them.  Just to think that I could have lost two of my children, makes me want to build an underground bunker somewhere & just live there with them!  I've always been a bit over protective ( yes my friends will all agree....) and right now I'm feeling very vulnerable....I want to sanitize everything in sight, put my kids in life jackets and helmets to go out of our room....body armor might not be too much at this point....as well as put them all on heart monitors... Most nights I wake up, and go and touch Sam and Sarah to make sure they are breathing....  I'd put them all in bed with me but Jon won't let me!  Living in the same room has been comforting in a way.  We were just talking about this today with our doctor.  And I have to say it comforts me to have them all around me, maybe that is why it's not bothered me much to live in a small room together for the past 17 weeks!   

 

Life is scary....we have no real control....

 

All we can do is love with all our hearts, hold each other tight and trust God. 

 

But tonight I'm just thankful, thankful that we are all still together.  Don't take your family for granted, you don't know what tomorrow might hold.   Be happy to take care of them, don't look at it as an inconvenience, look at it as an opportunity to show them how much you love them. 

 

Sometimes when I am taking care of Sarah, knowing how neglected she had been for so long, and she smiles up at me, my heart just clenches within me....  This morning I got her up, and gave her a warm bath, since she was a bit wet.  Then I rubbed medicine all over her skin, where she had had a slight outbreak of the skin condition she has had for years, that has scarred her feet and hands.  She just looked up and smiled, so happy, it made me want to cry.  I just love taking care of her and showing her how much I love her by taking care of her.  Then I took her and mashed up bananas, added some milk & sugar and you could just see JOY all over her face.  I would not trade being able to take care of her and love her for anything.

 

With the girls and with Shad, sometimes I can't "go there" in my mind of how their lives were before us.  I know a little but only a little and what I know is stuff that nightmares are made of.....  So I am blessed to be able to love them and give them new memories and expectations. 

 

So cherish the moments with your children....

 

My heart goes out to the families that have empty beds tonight....I'm so sorry....All I can say is I am thankful for the hope of eternity, where one day there will be no more death, no parting, no crying....no more funerals of people we love....

 

Love  your children and spouse with 100% of your heart, don't let anything, come between you and them, don't let anything else take their place.  In my life, only God comes before my family.  And I mean God not ministry or other people or anything else comes before them.   We love other people and the ministries God has placed us in but that is not our focus, not at all.  We've seen too many PK (preacher's kids) ruined or warped by the church/ministry coming before the family.  That has never & will never happen with us.   We committed to that a long time ago and continue to commit to that.  When we stand before God, we want our children standing with us!  We don't want to lose our boys hearts by letting other things, even good things, come first.  So I just want to encourage you to cherish each moment with your child.  Don't wish your time away, live in the moment!  As we have lived the last 17 weeks, in the middle of a storm, we've kept close to all our kids, we lived in the moments we had....it might have been a different kind of life that what we are used to, but even in this time, we have sowed into our kids & enjoyed them.  If I think too much about things, yes it makes me want to be home in our "normal" situation but that doesn't change where we are so I've tried to "embrace the present"  (doesn't that sound all new age, lovey dovey LOL?)  But it's true, we've lived in the moment, not knowing what the next day or week would bring....we still don' t really know what the future holds but then again who really knows the future but God? 

 

Thank you for your prayers for Selah, please keep them coming!!!