Selah coughed out a GOOBER today on the therapist! WOOHOO! Even our sweet therapist was happy about it! She actually coughed 2x! This is the first real cough she has done.
She had a BUSY good day today. Unfortunately the Fish Oil did not get delivered today but should be here Monday thank you Hurricane Sandy....We were all geared up for it but Monday will be the big day!
So Selah did great with OT today, after coughing up a goober:) This is HUGE (how many times have I said that?) She did cough little tiny coughs a few times in the PICU but hadn't done it again but this was a big good cough and she followed it up by doing it again!
She saw Speech today 2x and she did some good responses. The ST ordered a different type of trach, for Selah. She will be getting a speaking trach and she will have to learn how to do it. She will have ot learn to breath through her mouth. That is a step forward to going to not having one at all.
A person who works with brain injured people actually did a coma evaluation of her today. She was at Level 1 in the begining and now is at level 3. Full recovery would be Level 8 however since Selah did not talk before this, she probably wouldn't go but to Level 5 to be considered out of the coma. She is really working and changing almost daily.
Jon is taking Selah out in her stroller this afternoon. She stays busy all day:) It is just wonderful to see the great changes taking place with her.
I just have to point out something....when this happened in the beginning, we had to make a choice whether to put Selah on a feeding tube and a trach. It was not a hard decision for us....I KNOW some people probably thought we shouldn't have done that, but we respect LIFE. We made a promise to the judge in Ukraine, as well as to the orphanage director that we would give her the BEST we could give her.....and just because this happened, it didnt' change anything! We could have let her die, back in August...but we were committed to her and knowing that one day we will stand before the God of this Universe, we chose LIFE! Even tho' we knew it was the right moral/ethical decision didn't not change the fact that it was scary! I was terrified of the responsibility! I did NOT want to have to deal with a trach or a gtube....I actually passed out and even still can not be in the room when they are changing out the trach. But we chose LIFE knowing the responsibility we are accepting. Obviously we both felt incredibly guilty that Selah had the accident but even if the accident had been something else, that had nothing to do with us, we would have still chosen LIFE! It was an easy decision but hard in its' ramifications....
Do you understand that we did not take the easy way out??? I'm not saying that to pat ourselves on our backs. We are not saints. We made that decisions for the above reasons, and the number one reason being ~that we answer to God for our decisions.
In this world we live in, too many people make the easy decisions...whether it is to have an abortion & "take care of the problem" or walk away from your children and be irresponsible, or to take the easy way out in other areas...like just live together "cause "I don't need a piece of paper" or to divorce easily....
I'm sharing with you to "man Up"" put on your big girl panties" "set your face like a flint" "have a backbone" the easy thing is NOT the best thing!
Last night I said to Jon "what if we would have just let Selah die" we would have been dealing with guilt and we wouldn't be experiencing these wonderful daily miracles. BUT even if things had not gotten any better, STILL we would have done the right thing. We chose LIFE with very little hope that we'd see any changes....but thank God He gave us the courage to make the right decision. It would have been easy to have "let nature take its' course" no one would have blamed us.....but now look at the Miracles we are seeing!!!
So I encourage you to do the right thing even if it is not easy!!!! Do not take the easy way out in your life either! Do the right thing even if it is not the easy thing, do the right thing even if others give you a way out. Remember one day you will answer to God for the decisions you make in life. God can forgive you for anything and will if you ask for forgiveness but it's so much easier and better to just do the right thing first!
We are a thankful family tonight....please continue to pray for our Selah, pray that she will continue to cough and gag. Pray that she will have more head and limb control. Thank you!!!!
"Our life maybe a crazy life but it's our life" I'm married to a pastor of a small rural church, who is also the prison chaplain. We have 5 kids, each with their unique story. I love gardening & we all love the outdoors. Our life is not the way we planned it to be, but we are learning to trust God in every area. Come and read about our life as we live it to the fullest!
I'm so glad to hear that Selah is improving. The cough is huge! That's so wonderful! I pray she continues to improve!
ReplyDeleteI do think the decision of whether or not to go with the trach, feeding tube or other supportive measures is a very personal decision and it's different for each situation.
I just wanted to note that to decide against these measures isn't necessarily the "easy way out" and I do believe that it can be the right option in some instances. I say this as the aunt of a child who suffered a massive brain injury and was in a vegetative state for a couple years.
Our family opted for the supportive measures. But in retrospect, we agree across the board that it was the wrong decision. She suffered tremendously over the 2 years post-injury. She was completely unresponsive. She had violent, painful seizures dozens of times per day. She was constantly fighting infection and respiratory issues. This was not life. It was existence and a painful one at that. We pray that her mind was too damaged to actually experience the pain and discomfort that she would have been feeling.
In our case, the decision to choose life was the wrong one. In retrospect, our family feels that we took the easy way out by choosing life. It was easier to keep her here than to lose her....or so we thought! Ultimately, she passed away from complications, so she is now free and whole with Jesus.
In any event, I'm so happy to hear that Selah is improving and recovering to some degree! I hope you see even more good things once she starts the study.
And I'm so glad that you're at peace with your decision. That's really what matters in the end. Each situation is unique. And you never know precisely how you'd react until you're in that position -- a place that I wouldn't wish upon anyone!
All the best to you!
Sylvia
I have to disagree. There were times when things were so bleak for us and Selah. But since she was not brain dead, we don't feel we can make the decision of life and death. Since your niece expirenced pain, don't you think she would have expirenced pain from hunger? I do agree if a person is brain dead, then that is differnt, but even with that, I"ve heard of a couple of people who have "come back" from seemingly brain death. I did have an adult family member who recently had had a heart attack at the same time he was battling terminal liver cancer. He was put on life support and the doctors asked about taking him off. Since he had only been given a short time to live, the family did decide to take him off life support and he lived for a few hours. But that didn't mean taking him off fluids or food had he continued living and needed food, then probably a gtube would have been put in. . He still had IVs for fluid. I have a friend who had to make some end of life decisions for her parent who was in their 80's and again that is a bit different too, when you have muliple organ failures, you realize there is probably no coming back...it does get complicated but too many times I think ppl take the easy way out and they do it quickly. One man talked to my husband about his guilt feelings for taking his wife on life support after a stroke within hours because another person he knew had the same intial diagnosis and that family chose to keep the family on life suppport and that person came back completely. He really struggled with the fact he should have waited and gave her a chance.
DeleteI have filled out a living will due to surgeries, had discussions with my husband, etc. There are many options for people and denying food/water isn't necessarily a part of the option that would cause death. In many instances, the efforts to make someone comfortable is enough. I definitely would never want to be starved....at the same time I don't want to be trapped in a painful body with no escape. But that is my choice for me and I *completely* respect the choices you made for Selah, esp since I totally agree with your choices!
DeleteI guess I don't see the issue as black and white as there are so many different circumstances. I also say that honestly I don't think that people who make a different choice are taking the "easy way out"--not most of them anyway. Sure there are always some that live without conscience. But as we all are fallen souls, we truly cannot judge someone when we are not on their path. No sin is greater than any other sin in His eyes.
In any case, I am so happy to hear of Selah's increasing responses--you are quite good at explaining everything (you should write a book!) and I can't help but celebrate her advancements with you! Even goobers ;)
I thank God for Selah and the fact she has wonderful parents advocating for her!! xoxo
I do agree there are different kind of situtions and i even think if someone is brain dead then it's ok to remove form life support but not to deny liquids....although a mom just wrote on here that her son was brain dead and came back and is a teacher!
DeleteWOW! I know there would be lots and LOTS of praying before anything permanent was done for myself or my family. But yeah...denying food and liquids...that is just not ok for my or mine.
DeleteThank you for the reminder Yvonne (not choosing the easy path)! And THANK YOU for having the courage to not only choose life but to speak of it, no, YELL of it!
ReplyDeleteKatrina
Praying throughout every day for Selah and your family. Each day I pray for the things that you request. God bless all of you.
ReplyDeleteI agree with you Yvonne.... the high road is hard to take, but the closeness of God and how He teaches us by taking it, is life changing in itself....the easy road is just that easy, and sometimes with it there is no growth in the things the Lord would have for you.
ReplyDeleteI lost friends when I took the high road in a situation in our family. It was very painful, but the Lord wrapped us in His balm and healed...the evil one was always there to try to take from me what the Lord gave...the struggle was very hard, but I wouldn't trade it for anything less because I know in my heart what His Word is saying more clearly in situations now.
Thank you for your honesty and your transparency....adn thank you for letting me share my thoughts.
Love from NC
We are beyond excited to hear of these encouraging things!!! Please know that our family is praying and rejoicing with yours! Our Katya has defied medical expectations too so we know God can do things that amaze the professionals.
ReplyDeleteYVONNE-you and your Family are a great Blessing to me,we are continueing to Pray for SELAH.We just wanted to say thank you!May GOD'S BLESSINGS CONTINUE TO SHOWER YOUR FAMILY,AMEN.
ReplyDeleteThere are no easy decisions in life. Our son was considered brain dead twice, the second time it was confirmed, we did allow him to be taken off of life support. He is a high school teacher now. :)
ReplyDeleteHis case is extremely rare.
There is no way to really know what a right or wrong decision would be, unless somebody is making a decision to end a life because they determine somebody else's life isn't worth living.
Our girls had been given this sentence in Ukraine. They spent years in dying rooms, and lived to tell about it.
They are thriving.
God is the giver of life and all life is precious.
But I also think sometimes we do too much intervention and it can cause somebody to suffer even more than they would have if things had been left alone. (not talking about Selah Yvonne)
I am thinking of a terminal cancer patient given a few weeks to live unless you do this super duper chemo....and then they die a slow painful, nauseating death that is not natural.
No there are limits to interventions and I agree. We had a relative who had had a heart attck and terminal liver/lung cancer and we all agreed to take him off life support BUT maintain his fluids and had he recovered somehow then we'd probably all would have agreed to do more life substaining measures. He did after a few hours.
DeleteReally at times I wondered if too much was done to "bring" Selah back in the first place. She was given 4 shots into her heart to bring her back to life. BUT once she was back we felt we had an obligation to take care of her
I meant IN the begining I wondered if they tried too hard to bring her back....now I'm so thankful they did
DeleteMy grandfather had cancer and decided after several rounds battling that he was done (it was terminal to begin with though). My mother in law fought for 5 years and never stopped treatment, but it was just too much and mercifully the end didn't drag out.
DeleteI'm sure I would have done exactly what you did Yvonne. I love my children so much, they are my world and I would never have wanted to stop.
I know that God guided you into doing what was the best for your family and for Selah--and praise God He is doing miracles with her every day :)